


Place We Were Made

by Amelia020



Category: Waterloo Road (TV)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-14
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:55:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 22,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25900945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amelia020/pseuds/Amelia020
Summary: The ending they deserved. Reddie's Happily ever after - Eventually. I welcome all feedback and thoughts. Please let me know if you want me to continue with this. Just brain junk I needed to get out of my head! I appreciate all feedback and apologies in advance for my grammar I am not a writer! Thanks all A xoxo Disclaimer - I do not own Waterloo Road or Characters other than the ones I've made.PPS I have posted on FF too
Relationships: Eddie Lawson/Rachel Mason
Comments: 3
Kudos: 10





	1. Talkin' bout boys now we call ex.

Place we were made.  
Chapter One - 

Waterloo Road Rochdale May 2009  
“…. I can’t be your girlfriend, Melissa’s sister, Philip’s aunt and stepmother to your baby….”  
Rachel knew something wasn’t right, from the time when Grace was snatched out of Kim’s arms on that rainy day in April, her hormones were all over the place. She supposed that was the main principle in telling Eddie to leave on that miserable day in May. Self-preservation she told herself, and intrinsic need to protect everyone around her; apart from herself so it seemed.  
Melissa turning up unannounced and bursting their bubble of bliss with the impending arrival of Baby Lawson number three, raining once again on Rachel’s parade. Rachel had spent the last thirty five years of her life putting the needs of Melissa Fenshaw before her own, part of her vice history was due to unfound guilt of their parents apparent neglect, she wanted to ensure that her little sister had the best in life, that she wanted for nothing not like she had for so many years. Melissa naïve beyond her years, a constant immature stance on life. In their teenage years Rachel would put this down to a need for attention of any kind. Of course, her bigamy would attribute this lifestyle she had penned for herself, and allow Rachel to forgive her as always. 

Being her baby sister and that altruistic need to protect her would be the one and only reason that Rachel would push away the love of her life, the man who protected her at all costs, that so often put her needs before his own – of course other then that one time where he thought with his pants instead of his head. A regret he would carry for the rest of his life, or so it would seem.  
The school had been attacked and Rachel, took it personally. She made the vow to her colleagues and her kids that the school was more then a building it was their community, the teachers, the pupils and it was her. Rachel’s heart was shattered in to a million pieces, as she looked into the eyes of Eddie Lawson and mentally took a photo to last forever.  
It was gone 8pm before she finally stepped foot through her front door, immediately a feeling of loneliness washing over her, the house was cold – she could have sworn that she had the heating on timer – Philip’s influence on her home life was to turn this off, claiming that a jumper or blanket was more environmentally friendly – clearly another no brained idea to impress a girl or two from his class, if Rachel wasn’t sure Mika Grainger had left she could have attributed Phil’s new green stance to her. She felt a cold shiver run down her spine, it dawned on her just how alone she was now, constant reminders of the two men in her life that had in the sheer space of 12 hours walked out without a second glance. 

Flicking off her shoes and kicking them to the one side she shuffled into the kitchen, finding the Merlot she grabbed the bottle, no glass necessary she told herself; the only way to numb the pain would be to drown her sorrows. Because that’s what she was, sorrowful? Depressed? She couldn’t put a name to this feeling, she had singlehandedly ruined her own life, she had pushed the two people she loved most in the world out of her life and for what gain? None of her own. Self-pity she scalded herself for being weak as the tears started to leak from her eyes, betraying her hard nut exterior. Rachel was only relieved that she had held it together long enough to be in the seclusion of her own home.  
Three whole hours had passed, what she had done in that time was beyond her, she couldn’t blame it on the wine, the bottle remained corked on the table untouched. The TV wasn’t on nor was the radio, white noise and the muffled sounds of her heart wrenching sobs filling the room. Glancing at her wrist, she remembered the watch gifted to her earlier that day, Midnight they were supposed to be going to Paris for the May half term, she was certain Eddie planned to propose, how could one person cause so much destruction just by being themselves?


	2. Painting our face, straighten my hair…

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Each night I read my favorite fics and just wish I could be as talented! Like I said this story is just a jumble of thoughts in my head, I am not a writer by any stretch of the imagination so please do forgive any mistakes I have made! I am super critical of my own work, already!   
> You may wonder why I have placed Season 4’s finale in May – there is method to my madness I promise! (At least that is what I am telling myself!)  
> Each Chapter so far had been named after a line from the song Place we were Made by Maisie Peters – I listen to it on repeat when I write – give her ago!

Rachel lifted her eyes to the window on the south side of her room, she had forgotten to draw the curtains again. The sun filled her room with splendor and beauty. She could smell the morning dew, and just for one moment she forgot. Forgot what had happened, that they had gone. That she pushed them away. If she were not certain that they were not in the house, she could have sworn blind that she heard the radio and Eddie shuffling along to the delectable rhythms of Stevie Wonder. She must be dreaming. Suddenly it the room started to spin and everything was a blur, it took every ounce of energy she had to make the short journey to her en-suite, her mouth filling with that salty liquid that invades your mouth just before you vomit. Her head was pounding, how much had she drunk last night?   
Raising up from the floor she caught a glimpse of her reflection. Sadness and self-pity had taken over her, her face was ashen, regardless of the retching that had just happened, her skin felt see through. Pull yourself together Mason she told herself. Turning to switch on the shower she stripped and walked into the cubicle letting the steaming water cascade over her tired body. It was now that she allowed herself to wallow, now that she allowed the walls to crumble and the gut wrenching cry to pour from her soul, ten minutes was all she would allow herself before she came out and put on the Rachel Mason façade everyone was used to. 

No time like the present to make a change she thought to herself. Walking into the living room, she noticed the corked full bottle of merlot on the table, what a waste of a good vintage she thought to herself, this would be that last time that she would waste good grapes on a man. Juggling the bottle and the two empty mugs left the morning before: ‘Alexa what time is it?’ ‘5:30am Saturday 23rd 2009’ What could she possible do this early on the first day of her half term break, she had nowhere to be and no one who needed her. She pulled on her trainers, from the cupboard under the stairs, picked up her keys from the hall table and walked out the door, with no idea where she was going, ‘just follow your nose Mason’ she said to herself. Perks of being up and out this early meant that the local green was quiet, still only her breaths and her thoughts to keep her company. Rachel had never been afraid of her own company, something learnt early on in life that she was the only person she could and would ever depend on, until Eddie that was. Silently chastising herself she set off, running had always been an escape from the voices in her head, the ones telling her that she was not good enough, that she was nothing, not worthy of anyone. The adrenalin started to kick in, her breaths more pronounced, her legs pounding the tarmac walkway of the green, Rachel had never felt more alive. The fresh morning air filled her lungs and suddenly she could breath again. Not now, the salty watered saliva filled her senses and she had no choice but to lean over a bush and empty the contents of her stomach again. She had pushed herself too far. She started to warm up again, increasing her pace as she moved out of the green and onto the road, street lights were out and the sun was high in the sky, she passed the high street and cut down Selsey Road, she kept going concentrating only on her breathing she pushed through the pain and cramps. Suddenly she stopped dead in her tracks, number 45 Arrow Lane why was she here? His car was on the drive, the curtains drawn glancing at her watch she saw the time 6:15am. 45 minutes her subconscious had brought her here, she honestly hadn’t thought about where she would go when she put on her running shoes, her intentions were not for him, yet here she was like a magnet drawn shed come home to him. She leant against the lamppost across the road and just stared. He would not be awake, she had run 25k before he’d even stirred in the past, that man could sleep through an earthquake and be non the wiser, so allowing herself one minute of weakness would cause no harm. Away with her own thoughts she wondered what she would be doing if Melissa had not turned up, she knew of course shed be in there, in his arms in their bed.   
‘Rach?’ Every hair on her body stood to attention, she knew the voice but the pain in the tone, shattered her very core. Turning on the spot she took off, heart racing her legs matching the beat getting as much distance between them as she possibly could. She stopped abruptly, on the Highstreet, chest constricted as she fought for every breath. ‘You alright love?’ A woman aged 60ish put her hand on Rachel’s shoulder, ‘anything you need dear?’ Rachel expressed her gratitude, but she was fine. She walked into the nearest Boots Chemist and got a bottle of water and some anti-acid that would sort her out. 

She walked home, frantically trying to work out why shed been so rude, she was many things but rude was not something she was. No matter what happened she should have said Hi? The walk took it out of her, as she crawled up the drive, nodding to old Mr Poole as he took Bubbles for his morning walk. Maybe ill get a dog she thought something to occupy her mind.  
The Whitson week went by quicker than she thought possible, a routine formed. Every morning Rachel would run the 8 miles to Arrow Lane, longing to be in his arms, carful not to be seen or interrupted, she would walk back meeting Mr Poole in the green and play fetch with Bubbles. Was this her life now? There were multiple messages on her answering machine, she hadn’t bothered to check them, her mobile remained in the bottom of her briefcase still in the boot of her car, she knew she would have to retrieve it at some point today but that didn’t make it any easier.   
Sunday’s day of rest – hah Rachel Mason did not know what rest was let alone how to do it, she had totally re-modelled the Living room and her bedroom, taking away any lasting memory of them. Creams and Greys were the pallet of choice – basic and clean. She had considered putting it on the market and leaving the house completely, even for her that was insane. 7pm her suit was pressed and ready for the morning, it was time she had to get it out the car, why was this causing her so much distress, in her rational mind she knew that ignoring people was wrong, she had friends she knew that they would understand why surely? Dead. She knew it would be no chance her iPhone battery was that good! Shed have to get a new one she mentally added it to the list – he had persuaded her to get it, she took it into the study and plugged it in with the laptop and closed the door. One step at a time Mason.

35 Missed Calls Eddie Lawson  
22 Missed Calls Phil Nephew  
5 Missed Calls Steph Haydock   
2 Missed Calls Tom Clarkson   
10 Missed Calls Kim Campbell.  
144 Unread Text Messages.  
80 from Eddie – no chance she was opening them, seeing the last one.  
I will always love you Rach do not you forget that. E x  
10 from Kim…  
I heard about Melissa…… need to talk? Kim x  
Rachel Are you okay? Kim x  
Silly question.   
Wine?  
Tea?  
I am outside I won’t knock just open the door and let me in? Kim x  
Ill just sit here until you’re ready. Kim x  
You can come to mine if it’s easier?  
Rachel your scaring me now call me Kim x  
I’m calling the police if I do not hear from you by 9pm Sunday x

Shit 20:55 she had to call her. She was ashamed no doubt about it. Kim was understanding to a point, but she did not understand the intrinsic need to self-preserve, Eddie would get it she thought. A cough ‘Kim I am fine, I just needed some time, I will see you in the morning no need for police – I’ve had enough PC drama to last a lifetime! Thanks for the concern Good night Kim.’   
She was not fine, but that’s okay she needed time to help herself. She had rebuilt her life once before she could do it again. Sure, she would not have him, but one thing was certain she wouldn’t be alone. Looking down at the side of the bath Rachel saw the word shed waited a lifetime for but dreaded…  
Pregnant.  
2-4 weeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there you have it! Longer than before, I am not going to promise that each chapter will be long because I can’t make promises I probs won’t keep! As always please let me know what you think, I appreciate all your feedback and honesty!  
> I am going to try to do a chapter every Sunday and Wednesday – however once school starts back that maybe a challenge but if you want it, I will try!  
> Thank you for joining my brain junk and making sense of my jumbles.  
> A xoxo


	3. ‘Made by the small town secrets we'd keep’

Place we were Made  
Chapter 3 – ‘Made by the small town secrets we'd keep’  
The final term of school kicked off with sniggers in the corridors and whispers in the staff room. Staff and Pupils alike wondering why the sudden departure of Mr Lawson and the sudden sullenness of their Head. It of course had not been a secret that Rachel and Eddie had been together, it just hadn’t been shouted from the rooftops either. In the beginning Rachel had been adamant that she wanted to stay in their peaceful bubble away from prying eyes and school yard gossip, but Eddie on the other hand wanted to parade his girlfriend around not caring who knew and their opinion as long as they were happy. A middle ground had been found and whilst Rachel wasn’t keen on PDA’s she knew when Eddie needed some tactile response from her and when a simple hand hold on the way to their car at the end of the day was acceptable.   
Andrew Treneman had stayed in England with Kim. He’d started subbing lessons and as they were short a Maths teacher, he stepped in a natural apparently if no one knew his speciality was infact English you could be forgiven for thinking he was a Mathematician. Andrew had taken over the Lessons for life group in Eddie’s absence and helped with the preparation for GCSE and A-Level exams, in fact he had taken the brunt of Eddie’s responsibilities in the school and much to Rachel’s delight did his own paperwork. Rachel had rung the LEA and asked them to offer Andrew the permanent position. Rea however kept diverting the conversation and wouldn’t give a definitive answer, something was happening Rachel was sure of it, there had been whispers of school closures and Rachel would be damned if it would be Waterloo Road, she’d made a promise to the kids and she wasn’t about to break it without a fight.   
As the first week of the last term wound to an end Rachel found herself sat in the waiting room of the Obs and Gynae Department at Rochdale General hospital. She wondered to herself how did she get here, surely, she could not be pregnant it had to be a mistake. She had been on the pill since she was nineteen, there had been scares before but not 15 tests worth. It must be the menopause she thought or perhaps something more sinister. But her GP had sent her here to Rochdale Gen so it had to be something.   
‘Rachel Mason to see Dr Wallace room 3 please’ – Rachel slowly got up from her chair and walked towards the door marked room 1-5. ‘A’right miss?’ Rachel’s heart skipped a beat she’d purposely asked for the latest possible appointment so what she didn’t expect was to see Chlo Charles with baby Izzy staring back at her. ‘you okay Miss?’ ‘Chlo, sorry miles away how is baby Izzy?’ Looking down into the car seat she saw the angelic baby, babbling away in her seat looking doe eyed back at Rachel. ‘Rachel Mason room 3 please final call’ – That’s me I better run she said to Chlo swiftly turning on her heels and not looking back. She sincerely hoped that Chlo wouldn’t put two and two together to work out why she was there.   
Door number three, suddenly seemed like a climb up Everest. Rachel knocked on the door, a woman’s voice hoarse and quite crackly if she wasn’t in a Doctors office she could have sworn that was the voice of a woman who smoked at least 30 a day. Sitting at her desk was Dr Wallace – a woman mid 50’s with greying brown hair tied up in a bun on the top of her head, a warm smile on her face as she asked Rachel to sit down. She explained the blood test results and the initial urine test they had done the week before confirming Rachel’s pregnancy. Dr Wallace explained that at Rachel’s age she would be classed as a geriatric pregnancy, wow thought Rachel even at 36 she never thought she’d be classed as geriatric until late 70’s at least. Rachel’s mind started to wonder, how had she let this happen? How had it happened she was on contraception for the majority of her life, from 17 so how she’d fallen pregnant was a miracle. Just my luck she thought, she’d all but given up on a family life and children. With her past she knew that no man would want to marry her never mind have children. Of all the ways she had dreamt about this alone wasn’t how she wanted this to happen. When she thought of children she thought about two parents, successful and a house in the country, holidays abroad and PTFA meetings. Although financially Rachel could manage all of those things, one thing she was sure about was that she didn’t want too and couldn’t no do this alone. Rachel? Dr Wallace was asking her to pop onto the couch for her scan. This was all going by so fast, it seemed like yesterday she was watching Eddie race against Michela and the football team, eying him up in his Army overalls, laughing at his childish attempts to hold her hand, how she longed for him to be here holding her hand now. ‘This will be cold….’ Rachel jumped as the ice cold gel was placed on to her lower abdomen, as Dr Wallace started to move the probe around, pressing down slightly, Rachel closed her eyes and imagined if he were here holding her hand, other placed above her head, kissing her temple as they both watched the small monitor waiting to see their baby. Theirs something that was half of both of them, this would join them in union for life, a new start, an opportunity to learn and nurture together. They’d done a decent job with Phillip and Rachel was a natural with Michael, he was all over her whenever Eddie saw him. A tear ran down her face when she thought of that little boy, who she would likely never see again.   
‘And there they are… Baby one and Baby Two..’ What did she just here? Rachel stared at the screen in sheer shock. Two babies? Dr Wallace pointed out the two grey shapes on the screen too early to see proper features, another eight weeks before that would happen said the Dr, but they were definitely there, identical said Dr.Wallace as she could only see one placenta. She dated Rachel as 8 weeks and 4 days with both babies due 23rd December, an Early Christmas present she called them. She booked Rachel in with a midwife, and her next ultrasound which would be the end of July – great end of term was all Rachel could think. Stunned she took the print outs and walked in a daze out of the room and back out into the corridor.   
Thankfully Chlo Charles was not in the waiting room as she left, walking out the doors the June weather hit her full throttle in the face, a freak heatwave saw temperatures of 33 degrees in Rochdale! Rachel took off her jacket and threw it on the passenger seat, as she sat in the car and whacked on the AC she took the photo from her bag and it dawned on her, she was a mother. At last someone, people who would love her no matter what and her heart was filled with a yearning to hold her babies in her arms and never let them go. Rachel knew that she would never be alone again, however that did not stop the feeling of emptiness engulf her. She didn’t know where to go, normally she would go to Melissa if she needed a sounding board, give her some credit she couldn’t practise what she preached in any sense of the word, but that being said she had a wonderful way of pretending to listen to Rachel whilst Rachel sounded off and worked out her own problems. She should really go to Eddie, seen as he was the father there was no doubt in that. Rachel had not been with anyone other then Eddie in the last 4 years. Rachel knew what she had to do, but that did not stop her from ignoring her gut instinct and driving to the last place in the world she needed to be Waterloo Road. Rachel felt safe here, to anyone else who had been in a fire and a gun siege this would be no sanctuary but to her this was were she was happiest this was home.   
It was 18:30 – Rachel let herself into the school via the canteen back up area, she didn’t think anyone would be able, so she’d be able to go straight up to her office. She went into the fridge and sneaked a slice of Rose’s apple pie, Rachel’s favourite and seen as she was now carrying not one but two babies, she thought having two slices in one day would be more than acceptable. Eating as she walked up to her office, as she strolled up the corridors Rachel considered the work on the walls, all different abilities and ages, posters for the different clubs and sports teams, sign up for the next production Mama Mia. Rachel was filled with pride; she had meant what she said after the choir competition this school was a part of her and the students her family. She got to the antechamber placed her plate on Bridget’s desk, making a mental note to take that back down with her when she was leaving. The light in her office was on, she must have forgotten to turn it off in her rush to leave earlier on that day. She walked in and sat in her chair, a sudden wave of tiredness came over her and she was happy to be sitting. She pulled her diary out of her top draw and noted down her antenatal appointments and her next scan. Dr.Wallace had given her two copies one for mom and one for dad. Rachel didn’t have the guts to tell her she’d be doing this alone, that the father was none the wiser that he was now a father to five children by 3 different women, seriously you couldn’t even write this Rachel thought to herself. She leant back and stared at the two blobs on the photo, identical twins, double trouble and if they were going to be anything like either of their parents Rachel had her work cut out for her! She wondered who they would take after? Would they have her eyes and Eddies hair? She hoped that they would have her temperament as two fly off the handle teens would be more than enough for anyone to handle no matter how far away that scenario was.  
As she sat behind her desk Rachel looked longingly at the coffee machine on the cabinet by the window through to Bridget’s desk, no more caffeine Dr.Wallace had given her a list of foods and drinks to avoid, with coffee and wine being number one on the hitlist. Settling for a bottle of water out of the mini fridge underneath her desk Rachel set about constructing a list of pros and cons of telling Eddie – morally of course this was the worst thing Rachel could do – there was no question she needed to tell Eddie sooner, rather than later.   
What was supposed to be a list of pros and cons soon turned into a letter…

Dear Eddie,   
There is of course no easy way to say this. Some would agree of course that face to face is the only way that this should be done but I just cant see a way of doing that. Truth be told I knew I would love you from the day I saw you in our office. I’ve always thought of it as ours you know, the day Rea introduced us, you were so cross that I’d been brought in, and stolen your job. If I knew then what I know now I would have happily stepped aside to let you run the ship if I thought it would make you happy. Working alongside you brought joy to my life, gave me a reason to get out of bed in the morning and face the day. Seeing your scruffy smile every morning handing me my coffee was a highlight. When you found out about my secret shame I wanted to die, there and then I willed the ground to swallow me up. Seeing the disgust in your eyes burnt right through to my soul. It was like being shot the possibility of hurting you. When you helped get rid of Horley you said we’d tackle him together and boy did you mean it! When you thumped him one, I had to hold every ounce of self control I had not to pounce on you! When you asked me for a drink the day of the fire, I thought all my Christmases had come at once, even if you didn’t mean it as a date just to be near you, in your company I couldn’t wait. In the hospital I could hear your voice, I knew you were there, I wanted longed to reach out to you. But I was scared. I wanted to let you in but, you must understand why I did what I did, I had spent so many years running away from Amanda Fenshaw – I had to protect myself from the stereotypical men who had been my tortures during the worst time in my life. Not that I ever ever thought that was and will ever be you. The fire left me scarred, and of course I knew that you’d seen but I hadn’t been awake when you had, my body is the one thing about me that I’ve learnt that I have control over, so to be scared I felt exposed and used once more. Old thoughts of self hatred came back to me and I wondered who in their right mind could ever love me. I was on a one woman mission to self explode and I didn’t want to take you with me, so I pushed you away, into Melissa. If I had been open and honest in the beginning we wouldn’t be in this situation, in this mess. Now I’m not wishing your child away, you do not deserve that you are a wonderful father and I meant it when I said it was one of the reasons why I loved you. When I reflect on it, I never told you before that day that I loved you and when I did I said it wouldn’t change anything, but Eddie it has, being able to love you and be loved by you has changed my world upside down. I have never in my life wished and hoped for something as much as I hoped to be your partner, your love maybe even one day your wife. You loved me when I thought it was impossible, your selflessness is incredible and I will cherish our memories forever. For me Eddie there is and will be no one like you, I hope intime you will forgive me for what I have done and know that what I did was for you. You deserve to be the father I know you can be Michael is a credit to you and the way you are with him warms my heart. I don’t know what capacity out acquaintance will be now but know that this wasn’t done out of malice, I didn’t plan this and I certainly didn’t do it to get one over on Melissa no matter what she tries to say.  
Eddie I mean it when I say you were made to be a father, the love in your heart you have for your children is sublime which is why any child will be the luckiest children in the world.   
This is for you, I don’t expect anything from you in terms of support – I have all of that covered, but its only right you know.   
Yours Always,  
Rachel x

Rachel wasn’t aware anyone else was in the room until she heard the blinds being opened, ‘late one Rachel?’ Bridget asked handing her a cup of coffee, immediately the smell made Rachel’s stomach turn and she bolted to the nearest toilet. After a while she came back with embarrassment etched across her face, ‘how far gone are you?’ Bridget enquired handing Rachel a glass of water. Rachel was mortified how obvious was it, she wasn’t showing but she had been putting weight on, a lot of take away’s since there was no point in cooking for one. Holding her head in her hands Rachel started to cry, placing her arm over the head mistress Bridget explained she’d had 3 of her own and could smell a pregnancy a mile off. Rachel had fallen asleep on her desk, her letter to Eddie and the scan photo on her desk, Bridget handed them to her, ‘you’ll have to work out a plan soon, twins wont be easy to hide’ Rachel was thankful that Bridget had the good grace not to mention Eddie or the letter, she was in awe at the woman’s ability to work out what had taken Rachel 8 weeks. Rachel was unsure about a lot of things but one thing was sure, she had to give Bridget a raise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you once again for reading my rambles, I apologise in advance for what is coming, in my head I think true love is never easy… Next chapters will be more school based, and I am kind of in the time line the same as the show but with some differences. Spoiler in my story Max doesn’t exist.   
> Thanks again A xoxo


	4. Chapter Four – ‘And maybe the colours will fade.’

So urban legend says you must wait twelve weeks before announcing pregnancy, but Rachel did not follow the norm. The further she got in her pregnancy the better she thought she got at hiding it. She had of course let Rea at the LEA know, as she would need the time off for maternity, but other than that she was not telling anyone until necessary, and in Rachel’s mind the day she left would be sufficient however her body had other ideas. Rachel had her 12 week scan as planned and she was progressing nicely, Dr. Wallace had ordered all the tests needed to ensure the babies were well and growing. She has the amniocentesis to check for any defects, that was something she did not want to do again in a hurry. Her midwife Michelle had stopped asking about the babies father after their first home visit, something Rachel was thankful for, explaining why Eddie wasn’t around still hurt, but she was more embarrassed that the letter she wrote to him all those weeks ago lay in the top draw of her desk at Waterloo Road.   
It was results day for the A-Level students, Rachel and the other teachers had all come into school early to set up the hall with the different form groups, the envelopes were being stuffed by Tom, Davina, Steph and Kim. Overall a fantastic year for the pupils, the results were the best Waterloo Road had seen in over 20 years, a triumph for Rachel and her team. Considering the traumatic year it was a miracle that pupils managed to complete their exams let alone pass them with flying colours. The kids were due to start arriving from 11am, they had tried to stagger the form groups to allow the pupils one on one attention, there were different class rooms set up to cater for the students needs, the cooler had been temporarily turned into a computer lab, ready for those who needed to go through clearing to get to their university of choice. The MFL rooms were set up with the forms for those students who wanted to re-sit their exams. Andrew had set up laptops in his maths room ready to support those students who needed to sort out Student loans for university. Rachel slipped off to her office, as she progressed in this pregnancy waves of tiredness would hit her and with that came the cravings! She had been vegetarian for the last 15 years, but these babies wanted meat, bacon to be exact and Rachel didn’t want to explain why bacon sandwiches had become her snack of choice. She sat behind her desk and pulled out the secret frame in her top draw which held the photos of the scans of the twins at 8, 12 and 16 weeks. Absentmindedly she placed her hand on her swollen stomach and telling her twins all about Waterloo Road and how proud she was of all her staff and students. What she did not expect was to her the sound of a photo being taken. ‘What the… Chlo?’ Chlo Grainger stood at the door with a shit eating grin on her face. ‘I knew something was up when I saw you at the Gen! How far gone are you Miss? You look ready to drop…’ Rachel didn’t know what to say, half embarrassed half furious. ‘ I…. erm… 18 weeks.’ It was the first time that Rachel has disclosed information about her babies to someone other than Rea and Bridget. ‘Chlo please keep this under you hat, my personal life isn’t something I want discussing, and today is not about me its about all of you wonderful children.’ ‘I’m not being funny miss, but ‘ave you seen yourself? No amount of flowy dresses can hide that bump, you look further along than 18 weeks, you sure theres only one in there?’ Seeing the colour drain from Rachel’s face the penny dropped for Chlo.. ‘Well that does explain your bump do you know what your having?’ ‘Girls’ Rachel said rubbing her belly once more, she felt a flutter and her heart stopped. She must have looked like a deer caught in headlights, Chlo sniggered; ‘The first time I felt Izzy move I cried. Have you thought of any names?’ ‘Teddy and Connie well Theodora and Constance’ Very unique exclaimed Chlo. ‘Theyre the names of their Grandmothers, my Granny was Constance and Eddies..’ Rachel stopped herself saying anymore tears welling in her eyes it was the first time she’d said out loud that the babies were Eddie’s. ‘That’s so lovely, I named Izzy after my mom, sometimes in her mannerisms I swear she looks just like mom’ Some how Rachel and Chlo were now sitting side by side on the sofa’s in her office, ‘He doesn’t know. Eddie. I could not face him. Did you know that Melissa, my sister had his baby last month a little boy named John my dad was called John horrible man’. Chlo didn’t know what to say to Rachel, whilst she had always been down to earth and took a firm but fair stance, this was a new territory for them and Chlo didn’t know how to approach it. Rachel was no longer Chlo’s headmistress and more like her Step Dad’s friend so this wasn’t inappropriate. Chlo took Rachel’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. ‘Your body, your rules. But he has a right to know, as those babies have a right to know their dad, take it from someone who didn’t have the best father, but has the best Dad, little girls need their daddies. Tom has brought me and Mika up as his own he’s loved us since he met us and he shows us every day. When I see how he is with Izzy hes the best Papa.’ ‘Papa? – didn’t take Tom for a Papa’ – ‘He said he was too young to be a grandad! Laughed Chlo. Wiping the tears from her cheeks Rachel gasped at the time – Chlo weve got to get to the hall you’ve an envelop with your name on it! ‘Miss – will you do something for me?’ ‘Chlo call me Rachel please and yes what is it?’ Chlo took he belt off and placed it around the top of Rachel’s bump – ‘There your best asset why not show them off an be proud, you’re here to celebrate your kids successes you cant leave two out can you?’ The smile on Rachel’s face was all Chlo needed to grab her hand and pull her out of the office and down towards the hall before Rachel could change her mind. 

As they stood in front of the doors by the stained-glass window, Chlo nudged Rachel gently Now or Never – your Rachel Mason you kick ass. She said as she strolled into the hall. Taking one last deep breath Rachel pushed the doors open and walked into the hall, her head held high she walked up to the stage and addressed the already full hall. Rachel looked out at the hall, there were a few sniggers and shocked looks, Steph looked like she’d seen a ghost an immediately turned to Grantley who didn’t care. Placing a protective hand on her belly she addressed the room. ‘This has been one of the best set of results Waterloo Road has produced and you should all be so proud of yourselves. The hard work from staff and pupils alike has been fantastic, and I cannot praise you enough!’ ‘I made promises to you all when I arrived here and with your help we are making those promises come true. – I hope you all take time today to celebrate with your families and friends. I look forward to seeing your journey’s progress and hearing of all your successes in the future. You know I am always here for you all, you may no longer be at Waterloo Road but you’ll always be my pupils’ tears welled in Rachel’s eyes as the crowd erupted into cheers and applause. ‘Theres only one Miss Mason’, they chanted started off by Bolton Smilie and Donte Charles. Chlo looked at Rachel and smiled wide mouthing 4 A’s to her, with that Rachel burst into tears. Tom came over to her with a tissue, ‘You kept that quiet Mom’ Smiling and with a light chuckle Rachel hugged Tom.   
The next hour or so was filled with congratulations and lots of questions. Did she know what she was having, when was she due, the questions seemed never ending. As the hall started to empty, Rachel took the opportunity to sneak back to her office, on the way she slipped into the Maths room, remembering all of the times she stood outside this room, staring in the window at the marvel that was Eddie Lawson. Above anything else he was truly a fantastic teacher, able to command a room and keep them on track with equations and Pythagoras theorem. As she entered the room she remembered that it was being used today for the kids going to Uni to check their loan applications, she sat at the desk and looked at the list and where they were going and four names jumped out at her, these kids had proven that with hard work and great support you can achieve anything:

Felicity Mellor – Manchester University Law  
Marley Kelly – Manchester University Medicine  
Chlo Grainger – Manchester University Business Studies  
Bolton Smilie – Birmingham Uni Sports Science

She had to admit that Bolton’s name on the list had been a surprise, not that she didn’t think he could achieve, she had never known that University was something he wanted to do, she knew he was into his sports, Boxing and Football, she was immensely proud of him. Of all her pupils he had a special place in her heart, she had personally taken him under her wing and tried to guide him on the right path, he would never know just how proud of him she was. Wiping a tear from her eyes, someone standing at the door caught her eye, she looked up and saw that very person standing at the door with what could only be described as beautiful bunch of flowers. ‘a’right miss? I erm, just wanted to say thanks an that you know for always believin’ in me innit.’ Rachel looked at him, standing there she didn’t see the insolent young boy she’d seen at the beginning of term, the one who tied people in toilets with school uniform, or the boy who started fights for no reason. She saw a man, one who was growing and learning and becoming who he wanted to be. ‘Bolton, theyre beautiful are they for me?’ ‘Nah miss, theyre for the baby – erm babies? My mam said you was havin’ twins innnit – I figured with you hidin’ it away like no one would of got you owt. My mam gave us the idea, she said flowers and some clothes so we went up the high street an got ya these.’ He handed Rachel the flowers and a gift bag with two pink bears and two baby grows which had ‘My Moms the best’ written on them in swirly writing. Rachel was floored this was the first thing that she’d been given for the babies, and in fact the first anything that they had, Rachel had been waiting for the summer holidays to go shopping. The flood gates were well and truly open and Rachel was touched, honored that Bolton and Candice thought so much of her to do something so kind. Wiping away her tears seemed like a regular occurrence today, she took the tissue Tom had given her earlier and cleared her throat. ‘Bolton, you have honestly made me the proudest teacher today! It is because of pupils like you, my job is so worthwhile. You have surpassed all expectations, when I look at you standing there now, a true gentleman, one I am so happy to have been a part of your journey! I wish you nothing but success and happiness, one day I hope to see you back here again, teaching a generation of young Boltons, inspiring them with your story!’ ‘You think I could do that miss?’ Oh Bolton I know you can’. With that Bolton engulfed Rachel in his arms in a hug, she chuckled and hugged him back. ‘Come on, you have some celebrating to do and I’m far too hormonal to speak to anyone else today!’ ‘Can I walk you to your office?’ 

Bolton was a man of his word and with Rachel up to her office, where she was greeted with 6 other bouquets of flowers, with different cards. She was stunned. She knew that she had the approval from the kids from the fire last year, but this was something else. Feeling the lump in her throat she turned to Bolton and asked him to help her to her car, which he obliged taking her bags from her leaving her with the flowers he’d given her. She sat in her car waiting for Bolton to bring the last of her presents down. ‘You gonna be alright getting them out when you get home? I can come help you if you like?’ Thanking him for his kind offer she told him that she was meeting a friend and that she would arrange for them to help her. A lie of course she would just make multiple trips. A short while later and 6 trips to and from the car, Rachel collapsed on the sofa. Mentally telling herself and as lovely as her Audi A1 was, she needed to be practical and get a ‘family car’, scoffing to herself how had she turned from the woman with the sports car to the woman who would be driving a hatchback. Rachel spent her afternoon arranging her flowers, reading the notes from students and teachers. Matt wouldn’t be returning in September he sent Rachel a huge bunch of Sunflowers, telling her she was an inspiration and to never stop smiling. A bunch from Karla Bentham’s mother thanking her for supporting Karla. Some from Danielle and Aleesha thanking her for being ‘da best’ some from Kim and Andrew congratulating her on her fantastic year and the babies. As she slouched back she thought about how lucky she was to be in the job she loved most, at a school that was on the up and up producing pupils that against all odds were determined to prove the world wrong, she had a great team around her and she was a mother for the first time in forever she felt content with her situation, although she still missed him, she didn’t need him anymore.   
Rachel felt her eyes getting heavy and decided a quick nap on the sofa was allowed, when her landline went, she let the answer machine pick it up, only rushing to the receiver when she heard Rea’s voice over the speaker. ‘Hi Rachel, sorry to call you during the holidays, urgent news to share, please give me a call as soon as possible my mobile number is 07892318130 – oh and congratulations I’ve seen the league tables!’ Rachel pushed in the numbers Rea left and waited for her to pick up. ‘Hi Rea its Rachel’….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Firstly I promised to update on Wednesday and I totally lost track of the week! Also thank you again to RachelMasonFan39 again for your lovely comments and to Lynny and the two guest comments. I’m so glad that your enjoying this story as much as I am writing it, I am to excited to share the next chapter so you may be lucky and get another instalment before Sunday to make up for my tardiness!   
> A xoxo


	5. Wait for the bus, take us somewhere

Rachel Mason   
46 Vanguard Close  
Rochdale   
R13 LP9  
21/08/2008  
Dear Rachel,  
As per our telephone conversation, please find this letter as written confirmation of the offer made to you by the Greater Manchester LEA. Your deployment of Executive Head of the new Rochdale Learning Academy will commence as of 01/09/2008. Your appointment will see you in charge of 4 schools in the district as an overseeing and managerial role the schools are as follows:  
Rochdale High   
Forrest Mount   
St. Annes Girl School  
Waterloo Road Comprehensive.  
As you are aware the dissolution of John Forster’s Prep school has happened and as a result the LEA has re-positioned those pupils who had no where to go, full registers of those pupils have been sent to your new email address. There are new additions to the staff across the Academy including additions to the management teams they are as follows:

Rochdale High – Head Mrs L Morris.  
Deputy – Mr. M Wilding  
Pastoral Lead – Ms J Koreshi

Forrest Mont – Head Mr D Glover  
Deputy Miss S Diamond & Mrs R Fry  
Pastoral Lead – Miss L Dickey

St Annes - Head – Mrs K Fisher  
Deputy – Mr T Clarkson  
Pastoral – Ms D Shackleton

Waterloo Road - Head Mr E Lawson  
Deputies Mr A Treneman & Mr C Mead  
Pastoral Ms K Campbell.

Executive Manager for Academy Trust – Ms R Mason.  
Executive Chef across the academy – Mr A Fleet.  
Other additions to the staff will be as follows:  
Miss J Lipsett MFL – based at Waterloo Road  
Mr C Mead – Deputy WR and Head of Science. 

I have planned in your maternity from October half term as agreed you will be back for the Spring term on a part time basis until September.  
Contract signing for all new appointments will commence 3rd September. Your appointment will be first so you can hold the rest of the appointments from 11am.   
Any questions please call.

Yours Sincerely   
Rea Chattern.  
LEA Office Greater Manchester.

The letter had been sat on the coffee table for the last week, it was the night before she would be taking on her new role as Super Head. She had obviously told the staff that needed to know, as there were moves across the academy, that would take some getting used to! Tom had been promoted thoroughly deserved too, St. Anne’s is on the outskirts of Manchester closer to Chlo and Donte so a natural appointment for Tom, Karen Fisher had been Rachel’s room mate at college so she knew that she would look after Tom and Davina. Matt had applied for and got the job at Rochdale High before the end of last term and the merger of the academy Rachel was excited to see him flourish in his new role. The appointment of Andrew back to Deputy of Waterloo Road was something Rachel insisted on a leaving present to the pupils and staff, she had no say on the new Head this was done without her input and clearly for very good reason! Rea had failed to mention who the new Head was, apparently her breakup with Eddie not so old news as she once thought. Rachel hadn’t told the rest of the staff or pupils she wouldn’t be there this new school year yet the big reveal would soon come, she only hoped that others mainly one Mr Lawson hadn’t told anyone of his new promotion.  
16 weeks ago, that was the last time she saw Eddie Lawson. Rachel was petrified of this re-union. She had been cowardly, in not telling him she was pregnant, she had been thinking of excuses for her behaviour – she was sick? She certainly was, sick of lying. Rachel knew she had to bite the bullet and get it over and done with. Eddie had the right to know, he had two more children and not from a third party as soon as Steph and Grantly got to him there would be no going back and at the very least he deserved not to find out tomorrow at his contract signing.   
Dialling Eddie Lawson…..  
‘You’ve reached the voicemail of Eddie Lawson, I can’t get to the phone right now, leave your name and number and I’ll get back to you.’  
‘Eddie, its me. Erm Rachel. Obviously, you know its me. Well erm I need to talk to you urgently really. Erm I guess I should congratulate you on your appointment. I couldn’t have given Waterloo Road to anyone else honestly Eddie you will be fantastic the kids all miss you and want you back, they will be pleasantly surprised next week I know. Listen there are somethings you need to know before tomorrow, I know I am calling late, and I have no right to ask but can you call me back as soon as you get this, it really is important. Anyway I’ll leave you to it… I love… well bye. – its Rachel Mason by the way.’

Rolling her eyes and collapsing on the sofa Rachel yearned for a bottle of wine, how embarrassing was that, its Rachel Mason by the way… what did he have amnesia now, would he just forget her? Rachel jumped as her house phone rang – he had not called so soon surely? She tentatively picked up the phone ‘Hello?’  
It turned out it was Chlo, inviting her over for a Last Supper in Rochdale before the family moved to Manchester in the morning, Rachel couldn’t resist she invited them all over to her house she had furniture and whilst she was happy to receive the invitation she really didn’t revel in the prospect of getting dressed. 6pm The Clarkson-Charles clan arrived with enough pizza to feed the 5,000 ‘Well you are growing two humans in there miss – I mean Rachel’ exclaimed Donte ‘ Come on in Donte I’m sure you remember where the dinning room is?’ laughed Rachel, giving Tom and Davina a quick hug as they passed, Chlo was last through the door carrying Izzy in her arms, the little girl growing more and more every day, the shrill that came from the tiny human made Rachel jump, little podgy arms wormed their way out to Rachel and she chuckled as she took Baby Izzy from Chlo, closing the door as the two women made their way into the dinning room with the others. Izzy didn’t leave Rachel’s side all evening eventually falling asleep draped over Rachel’s bump. Rachel smiled as she stroked the little girls golden hair, ‘want me to take her Rach?’ Asked Chlo. Rachel just shook her head, no one called her Rach only Eddie, and it didn’t feel unnatural coming from Chlo, this girl had gone from pupil to sort of niece/friend in the space of a few months. Chlo Charles had become Rachel’s sounding board and someone she confided in, who knew that a 18 year old would become so close to Rachel in her time of need. The doorbell rung, it was 9pm Tom went to get it asking Rachel if she was expecting anyone? Rachel shook her head, hopelessly in rapture with the little babe in her arms.   
Muffled voices could be heard in the hall, Donte, Chlo and Davina all looked at each other with tense expressions, but Rachel was in a world of her own and didn’t recognise the voices or rather the voice she could hear, it was until he came into the room and stood to the left of her that she laid eyes on him.

‘Hi Rach, I think its time we talked, don’t you?'

In his hands was her letter, forgotten in her draw at Waterloo Road and the frame with the scan photos that were in the office.

Chlo took Izzy and the others slowly left, ‘I’m so sorry Rachel please forgive me’ Whispered Chlo as she took Izzy away the young girl wailing to be ripped from Rachel. 

‘They’re girls, and they’re yours’.


	6. Anywhere, as far away from home

Chapter 6 – ‘anywhere, as far away from home…’

‘They’re mine? Is that all you can say Rachel? Flamin’ hell. What, is that supposed to soften the blow of ignoring me for the last five months? Am I that much of a monster to you that you could keep this a secret? You couldn’t pick up the phone eh? For God’s sake Rachel I saw you that day and you literally bolted as fast as your legs could take you! Imagine yourself in my position a phone call from Chlo Grainger and an envelope with a half-arsed excuse of a letter with scan photos I wasn’t even allowed to attend?’ ‘Charles’ ‘What?’ ‘Chlo’s name is… it doesn’t matter…’ 

Eddie had not sat down since he arrived the first ten minutes spent in agonising silence, just the sound of Eddie’s shoes on the hard wood floors reverberating round the living room. Clutching the letter and frame in his hands you could practically see the steam coming from his ears he was so angry and had every right to be.   
‘You know what I don’t understand Rachel? Is that of all the people in the world you chose to confide in an 18 year old school girl, instead of me the father’ ‘Who else was there Eddie? Eh? What more do you want? Who did you want me to speak to, you? You who had the perfect set up? Nice house in the suburbs, lovely little boy, baby on the way ready made family. You and Melissa pick up where you left off, get married have your baby together and what was I supposed to do call you up and say what? Who else was there? My sister? My Nephew? All gone, left me like everyone else in my life. I was already the laughing stock of the class room thanks to Melissa’s dramatic arrival, had the governors and the LEA breathing down my neck, I was left picking up the pieces after your mess So, excuse me for wanting to protect myself and my children.’ ‘Your children? They’re mine too Rachel, I had HAVE a right to know. What were you going to do tomorrow eh, pretend that they weren’t mine? Pretend like they weren’t there, can’t hide that bump Rachel. And as for my mess you’re the one who told me to go. You pushed me away. I was ready to make it work, I picked you once before remembering I was choosing you again. Was that all part of your plan eh? Tell me to piss off so you could hide this from me? ‘Of course, not is that what you think of me eh? That I’m so vindictive I could do that? I did it for you, I couldn’t stand by whilst you pretended to be okay not seeing another child, missing out on them growing up.’ Rachel too had gotten up and was pacing, in and out of the living room, her head was spinning this wasn’t how this was suppose to go, but then again what did she expect Eddie to run into her arms and be over joyed? ‘Rach?’ ‘No, you don’t get to blame me for this Eddie, I was wrong in not telling you, but I didn’t know when I told you to go at the end of term, my world was smashed into pieces that day, I was left with nothing. No one. I was scared, I hadn’t felt that alone and empty since I was 17, I ran to your house every day. Every day I tried to tell you, I wrote that letter the day I had the first scan, every time I caught a glimpse of you, heard your name mentioned I was paralysed with fear. I didn’t intend to hurt you, I never meant it to go this far.’ 

Rachel shuffled off to the kitchen and put the kettle on, automatically getting their mugs, she still hadn’t managed to force herself to get rid of his stuff, something which she found comfort in, strangely. Making their brew’s she perched on the counter by the sink, right hand protectively over her bump in her left was the mug, she didn’t need to look up to know he was now in the kitchen, looking around he noticed the fridge with more scan photos, and photo’s of Rachel and her ever growing bump and there in the midst of them all was one of the pair of them, it was taken the night after the Army came to the school, both of them gazing into each other’s eyes, they’d been out for dinner and some even was on with a photographer and Eddie jumped at the chance, the photo screamed out how much in love the pair of them were, although neither had the courage to admit it at the time. Eddie picked up his mug, surprised it was still here, a souvenir Rachel had picked up on the course she’d been on not long after the bowling, Eddie claimed it was a good luck charm for them, he didn’t even need to look in the mug to know Rachel had made him his coffee just the way he liked it, what did surprise him though was the pint of bitter on the kitchen island that Rachel had poured out for him, in case he preferred the alcohol to the coffee. Deciding on the sensible route he placed the mug down, picked up the beer and walked over to the sink, leaning passed Rachel he poured it down the sink. ‘I don’t think either of us need that right now’ he calmly said. Rachel visibly tensed as she saw Eddie come directly over to her, confident that he wouldn’t hurt her but tense all the same, at the moment he reached the sink, Rachel felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand on edge, she could feel his breath on her cheek. Releasing a breath, she didn’t know she was holding in, she gasped as twin number one booted her in the rib, inhaling sharply she flinched at the sudden pain. Automatically Eddie placed his hand on the small of her back concern etched across his face. ‘What is it Rach, are you okay?’ Instead of replying Rachel put her mug on the side and grabbed Eddie’s hand placing it just above her left hip, leaving her hand on top of his, she turned to look into his eyes, reveling as he felt for the first time their baby moving. Tears sprang into Eddie’s eyes, watching his reaction Rachel ached to fall into his arms, ‘I am sorry.’ Rachel walked back into the living room leaving Eddie rooted to the spot, over come with emotion. 

It was 11pm, Rachel was exhausted, and they weren’t talking, Eddie was still in the house he was fixated on the scan photo’s in his hand and the letter. ‘I mean every word, Eddie truly if I could do it all again I would, I would have told you that day I was late, I would have told you the next day, I would have picked up your calls answered every text, don’t you see that? You are my soul mate Eddie, everything I did was to protect you, and your children. I know it doesn’t seem that way, I know I look like a selfish bitch but that’s not me, Eddie. Without you I didn’t feel whole, pushing you away took every ounce of strength I had, you needed time with your baby and I couldn’t take that away from you, and when I found out about the twins, I was faced with Pandora’s box, I couldn’t take you away from Melissa and John and what about poor Michael? In my head by prolonging telling you I was protecting you, I see I was so terribly wrong. I would have told you, I wanted to tell you tonight I rang you.’ ‘I didn’t get the message.’ Eddie pulled his phone out and the notification flashed up on his screen – 1 missed called Rach 1 voicemail from Rach ‘Melissa and I aren’t together, we never were, you think I could forget you that easy? House in the suburbs that was supposed to be our dream. The day you saw me, I was showing the estate agent round, selling up I couldn’t be there without you. I called over 100 times Rach, it wasn’t over for me. You never once picked up, didn’t even read my texts I just presumed you’d changed your number. I drove round here so many times just to check that you were safe, I saw Kim a few times she said you’d been ignoring her too. Michael misses his Rachey, he’s only just started coming round the flat, wouldn’t come to mine for weeks because you weren’t there.’ A sob escaped from Rachel and Eddie moved to sit next to her, automatically placing his hand in hers. ‘You must hate me; I don’t blame you. I am an idiot.’ ‘Rachel Mason, I couldn’t hate you if I tried, yes I am annoyed, hurt confused but hate you never, I love you always have and always will, you are the mother of my children, my daughters! I cant believe it’ Tears flowing down the face of both Rachel and Eddie now, tears of pain and hurt but also a mutual understanding that this was new territory for the both of them, and whilst they had both made unbelievable mistakes, there were two things that they had gotten right. 

Rachel pulled out a box from under the coffee table, placing it in front of Eddie, ‘this is for you, congratulations Daddy.’ Rachel smiled sweetly at him, Eddie swiped the tears from her cheek and turned his gaze to the box on the table, he attentively removed the lid and there was a scrap book and on top was a letter in the delicate scroll of Rachel’s left hand:

Dear Daddy,  
If you are reading this, then you know about us at last! You mustn’t be cross at Mummy for long she was just doing what she thought was best, you know what she is like, she never learns not without you to help her and remind her that she cant save the world! We love you and our brothers so much already and we’ve not even met them! Mummy plays us recordings of our big brother Mikey, we like it when he talks about cars, we think hes going to be the best big brother ever. Mummy said we have another brother, but we don’t know much about him maybe you can tell us. We love bacon sandwiches! Mummy struggled to keep that a secret from everyone at work! We also love green tea and pickled onions. Mummy is always sick after we asked for them though we don’t understand why! Mummy reads us a long book called Crime and Punishment its about a Russian Man, but you know that because you brought it for her. We love your voice too, at night when mummy wants to sleep we kick her until she plays us the video of you singing Happy Birthday to her, we cant wait until you sing to us. Were growing nicely, Teddy is the bigger one, I think she’s been eating all the bacon! She also kicks Mummy more than I do, me, Connie I don’t like to kick or hurt Mummy, I just like to be snuggly in her belly, I’m a lot smaller then Teddy but the nice lady is keeping an eye on me. They think we’ve got lots of hair because Mummy keeps getting heart burn. She cries a lot because she misses you and because her clothes do not fit her anymore, Mummy is already looking after us though, she’s taking her vitamins and she stopped drinking wine and coffee, she must really love us!   
Anyway Daddy, Mummy wanted you to have everything that you missed out on because you and Mummy fell out. We put it in a book for you, we hope you like it. Looking forward to the day we get a cuddle with you.   
Lots of Love,  
Theodora and Constance.  
Xxx

‘You named them after my mom and your gran?’ Rachel just nodded unable to speak. Eddie took the book out of the box, the cover was the girls names Teddy and Connie Lawson and the first scan photo, as he turned the pages, there were different photos of Eddie and Michael, Rachel and Michael, Rachel and Eddie Phillip and some of Eddie’s parents. There were scan photos test results, photos of Rachel’s ever-changing body. Rachel had documented every possible event that had happened throughout her pregnancy so far. Eddie was sobbing, his whole upper body was convulsing, Rachel tentatively reached out to hold him and he fell into her, cradling her bump…

‘Daddies here.’


	7. All we talk about is leaving...

‘I just don’t think it’s the best idea. Its not that I don’t want to, I do, but we’ve hardly said two words to each other in the last 4 weeks that hasn’t been about work. Its so close to the twins arriving what if they come early? Statistically they do you know.’ ‘Rachel! Stop and breath! You have time October is still 8 weeks before the babies are due AND its Cornwall hardly the other side of the world, I’m sure the hospitals down there are far better than Rochdale Gen! They’re your first babies no doubt you’ll carry to term, even if there are two of them in there! When I was carrying Bex and Jess they were both 10 days late – just as stubborn now as they were then! And you not talking thing, well he did ask you for time Rachel and if he’s invited you then the decent thing would be to go, its only for five days. What have you got to lose?’ ‘Just I don’t know Karen, its been tough enough being in the office with him not speaking for the two days a week I’ve been at Waterloo Road, a ten hour plus round trip and five days of awkwardness isn’t what I really want for the beginning of my maternity leave!’ ‘Pfft maternity leave, Rachel Mason the day you go on maternity leave and actually turn off will be the day those girls arrive! I think instead of talking to me about this you should call Eddie and tell him your concerns, you teach teenagers doesn’t mean you have to behave like them!’ ‘As always Karen sound advice from you! Ill let you get back to your merlot, have a big swig for me, I’ll be in next week before I break up to do Tom’s appraisal. Night Karen and thanks!’ ‘Night Rachel and no need that’s what friends are for!’  
Rachel replaced the phone back onto the receiver and dug out her mobile from her bag, Karen was literally the only person who called her on the house phone nowadays. The last four weeks Rachel appeared to have doubled in size and was now more uncomfortable than ever, there was only one week left of school before she took 6 months off for maternity, like Karen said she wanted to carry on until the kids broke up for Christmas but her midwife was very certain that the twins would be here before December, Rachel hoped this wasn’t the case as she hoped to work from home for the last 8 weeks on the sly, she had enough allies to keep her updated on the goings on in the four schools genius moves on her part she smugly thought to herself. Reclining back and placing the pillow strategically round her lower back, she pressed Eddies name on her phone and waited for him to answer. 

‘Hello Rachey!!!’ ‘Mikey! How are you darling?’ ‘ Me good, where are you I miss you, Daddy said Imma be a big sister brother did you know?’ ‘Yes sweetheart I do know’ ‘I’m so ‘cited Rachey ima teach them so many things! Daddy told me the names too Ted and onnie ted like my brown bear! Me and Daddy went to Toys R us last Saturday an brough lots of toys for them, lots of pink stuff Daddy said he was gonna ask if I could come to you house but he never did.’ ‘Well that’s why Im ringing Mikey is Daddy there?’ ‘you say I come to you house? Is Phil there still or he at that mean itches house?’ ‘ha he lives with his mommy remember, Melissa?’ ‘oh yeah you onnie and teds mommy not Phil’s’ ‘yes Mikey I’m the girls mommy.’ ‘You a good mommy rachey, you just like my mommy cept I call you Rachey.’ ‘yes Mikey have you found Daddy yet?’ ‘Daddy wake up! Mommy Rachey on the phone you were napping so I talked to her, she funny she laff when I called Mel a itch! Got to go now Rachey love you!’ ‘and I love you my darling, see you soon’ ‘Everything okay Rach?’ ‘Yes, nothing wrong as such…’ ‘is it the twins, there not coming, are they? I’ll have to drop Mikey home, but I can be at the hospital in 20….’ ‘Eddie no! They’re both fine still snug in there! They’re not why I’m calling.’ ‘Oh thank God, what is it then?’ ‘I erm didn’t give you an answer about going away in half term, I erm just wanted to clear somethings up, you know before we decide..’ ‘Okay, there’s nothing to overthink here Rachel I just wanted to give you a break and Mikey misses you, I know you love the sea, and well your not going to relax are you so why not come and spend sometime where you have nothing to think about except pasties and scones?’ ‘ha you’ve seen the size of me, I do not need pastry of any kind! ‘ Your radiant Rach pregnancy really suits you.’ ‘Eddie…’ ‘Just come, its five days I’ll drive even if you just do your own thing ill be content knowing your away from Rochdale, it’ll be nice.’ ‘Okay.’ ‘Okay? You’re coming then?’ ‘Why not, I do love the sea and I miss Michael too.’ ‘Great. Mummy Rachey eh nice ring to it…’ ‘I didn’t ask him to call me that.’ ‘Rach hes been calling it you since before we broke up! You just never heard him, good judge of character my boy!’ ‘Eddie, I’m worried its going to be awkward, and I don’t want that for Michael.’ ‘Well we best not be awkward then!’ ‘Eddie!’ ‘I brought the girls some stuff at the weekend, can I erm drop it over in the morning?’ ‘Of course Mikey did mention it, but Eddie don’t you want to keep it at yours for when they stay with you?’ ‘Stay with me? I erm.. I didn’t think.’ ‘What that I wouldn’t let you see them? Eddie they are half yours too, I’m not going to stop you having them, regardless of what is going on between us!’ ‘I’ll be whatever you need me to be you know that.’ ‘I know, you want to stay for your lunch, ill make a roast?’ ‘Brilliant, make sure you do that thing with the..’ ‘Carrots I will!’ ‘Anyway I best get this monster to bed, we’ll see you in the morning Rach, goodnight’ ‘Night Eddie love you.’

The line went dead, what had she just said? Slapping herself on the head she chastised herself for the slip, and for offering to make Sunday lunch, she had nothing in, whilst her eating habits had gotten better for the twins sake she still lived a minimal life, the fridge was stocked with only the essentials for one person, shed have to get up in the morning and make the trip to Sainsbury’s luckily only a two minute journey in the car, what was unlucky was that she could no longer fit behind the wheel so it would have to be a taxi job. Rachel slowly peeled herself off the sofa and locked up downstairs, climbing up to the middle floor of her town house she looked into the half done spare room, she’d started painting the walls cream and mustard yellow, a safari inspired babies room was the idea, it was just she’d run out of steam half way through she’d have to get a professional in. Rachel began her nightly routine of getting ready for bed, once in she picked up her kindle and continued reading the latest baby book hoping for some divine inspiration. After an hour or so, Rachel found herself starting to drift off to sleep, it was the ping of a message alert that startled her out of her slumber a text, stretching over to pick up her phone she saw the message:

One new message from Eddie Lawson:

I’ll pick you up at 10, there’s no way you have the stuff for a full roast and Mikey is a growing lad.

Rachel – Aha I’m sure its not just Mikey! Thanks Eddie you know me so well! See you in the morning.#

Eddie – No worries.   
Eddie - I love you too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for all your lovely reviews and Kudos! Just a wee update tonight, the next two chapters may be my favourite, as I’m now at a point where I am writing from scratch so what comes next is a surprise to you and me! Spoiler for the next two there is a lot of fluff, someone’s parents (BIG clue not Rachel’s) the beach, lots of talking and potentially an unwelcome visitor for our favourite Head Teachers! Thanks again for reading my brain junk A xoxo


	8. ‘Stumbling home over the field…’

He loves me too. That’s all Rachel could think about whilst hopelessly searching for sleep that night. The further she got into her pregnancy the more uncomfortable she felt, she spent most nights rearranging the pregnancy pillow Chlo had sent, but tonight it wasn’t struggling to lie with her bump that was stopping her from falling asleep it was him. For the last five months Rachel had been determined to not think about Eddie Lawson, how much she yearned to be with him, how much she missed him and how much she loved him. It wasn’t easy especially hiding his babies from the world and him, but once he knew and asked for time Rachel felt he was indifferent towards her and that helped to settle the longing in the pit of her stomach. Any conversations that they had were about school or the twins and Michael. When he had invited her to Cornwall for the week, she’d been stumped but then when he said it was just for a relaxing week out of Rochdale and Michael would be coming she felt that pang of wanting in the pit of her stomach. Ever the overthinker this was intensified when she slipped up and said I love you at the end of their phone call. When he replied that he loved her too albeit an hour later via text, maybe just maybe this was their way back to each other? Finally with thoughts of watching a happy Michael running along the beach with Eddie trailing after him Rachel closed her eyes. 

9am – Rachel thought she’d better get up Eddie and Mikey would be here in an hour, and the house definitely needed the once over, not that she was messy but housework had not been on her radar for sometime – with the departure of the Clarkson-Charles family no one had been round in weeks. Rachel showered then stood in front of her wardrobe, spontaneously bursting into tears, her go to in the house was now sweatpants and a t-shirt she couldn’t wear that today, could she? What did she want to achieve? Did she just want to spent time with Eddie and Michael or was she looking to impress because if the latter she wasn’t going to be able to do that with anything in this closet. Most of her go to outfits had gone from pencil skirts and shirt jumper combos with knee high boots to midi dresses and converse. Taking the mustard yellow dress off the hanger, she pulled it over her head and looking in the mirror she smiled to herself as she put her hand on her bump, she’s grown more, taking a quick snap on her phone – something she’d continued to do regardless that Eddie now knew about them. Settling on a subtle BB cream and light coating of mascara, Rachel scraped her hair back into a messy bun, she would have to do. 

Rachel had the kettle ready to go and the two mugs ready and waiting for when they arrived, glancing at the clock 09:55 not surprised in the slightest when the door bell rang and a little banging on the door. ‘Mikey give her a chance to get to the door will ya? Were early yet she’s probs upstairs’ Opening the door Rachel was immediately greeted by Michael’s arms wrapping around her swollen belly. ‘Hi Onnie Hi Teddy – its me Mikey’ ‘Owww’ The twins kicked Rachel and Michael felt the full force. ‘Rachey was that the baby?’ ‘Yes Mikey come on lets get you inside its cold’ Bending down Rachel picked Michael up and sat him on her hip, unpractical and very uncomfortable but the feeling of Michaels arms wrapped around her neck was enough to make her forget. Eddie stood in the doorway unable to move he was enraptured with the scene before him, the two people he loved most in the world he thought to himself, he captured the scene with his phone as discreetly as he could. ‘Rach were shall I put this stuff for the girls?’ Rachel popped her head out of the kitchen to find her hallway covered in various bags and boxes. ‘Oh Eddie, you really didn’t need to you know!’ ‘I know Rachel I wanted to now which room shall I put this stuff in?’ Rachel smiled sweetly at him and directed him to the middle floor where the twins room was. Taking the largest box of all first Eddie descended on the stairs, refusing any form of help from Rachel demanding she sat in the front room whilst he sorted everything out, he did struggle slightly and was thankful Rachel had changed the rooms around in the house, her room was at the top of the house, clearly if the twins would be in the middle she must have moved down here herself. Eddie found the room, half decorated. It then dawned on him that instead of asking for space he should have been here helping her to do this stuff, regardless of the situation between them and the truths that had been concealed they shouldn’t be taking it out on the kids any of them! Eddie picked up the discarded paint brushes and re-opened the tin of paint, if he finished the last walls off now it should be alright by the time that they came back later on, change of plans he thought maybe they could eat out. 

It was midday when Eddie came down the stairs, happy with what he had accomplished but astonished that Rachel or Michael hadn’t come to find him. Calling out for them and getting no answer, he knew what must have happened, and as a result he wasn’t surprised when he found the pair of them fast asleep on the sofa, watching Pepa Pig. Eddie chuckled to himself, swiped his keys of the side where he’d left them and popped out. Rachel woke just after two o clock with Michael wrapped in her arms still soundly sleeping, glancing at the clock she gently woke the little boy. ‘Mikey darling you need to wake up for me’ ‘ergh Mummy Rach I’m hungry’ ‘Yes me too, let see where Daddy is okay’ ‘Okay Mummy’ Rachel looked at the little boy and gave him the biggest hug she could muster, she would of course talk to Eddie later about Michael calling her Mummy. Rachel called out for Eddie but got no answer, going into the kitchen she handed Michael a chocolate biscuit and went off in search of Eddie. Getting to the bottom of the stairs, she called him once more but heard nothing other than the music. She couldn’t quite hear the melody but the beat was unmistakable – Eddie was listening to Stevie Wonder. Rachel slowly climbed the stairs to the middle floor, the door to the girls room was slightly ajar so Rachel creeped round to look in, there she saw Eddie putting the finishing touches to the nursery. Rachel was gobsmacked, how did Eddie know exactly what she wanted to do in this room with only half a wall painted. Rachel slowly opened the door to find Eddie asleep in the corner of the room on a rocking chair. As she looked around Rachel saw that Eddie had done everything for her, all of the stuff he had brought for their girls was stuff she hadn’t even thought of let alone got, Rachel thought she could just order it all online, Eddie clearly knew her better than anyone.. 

The walls were painted chocolate brown and mustard yellow, the floor was the same as before except there wad an addition of a cream fluffy rug, on the far hand side was a oak cot with a fabric T above it and next to it an identical one with a C. There was a changing unit made up stocked with nappies, wipes creams and lotions. The chair that Eddie was sitting on was in the window there were shelves put up on the wall with the two pink teddies Bolton Smilie had given on and an arrangement of photographs one of Eddie and Michael, one of Rachel, scans of the girls and two Rachel hadn’t seen before. One was of her and Eddie from the army day at Waterloo Road, Eddie had his arm slung around Rachel’s neck and she was looking at him laughing, the other was of Rachel sitting in what was her office at Waterloo Road with the hand on her stomach – it was the photo Chlo had taken of her on results day. In the corner there was a large standing Giraffe teddy and Elephant. 

‘Don’t cry Rach’ Eddie came and stood next to Rachel she smiled up at him, ‘Oh Eddie these are happy tears! But how did you know? And where did you get all the stuff how did you manage to do it all?’ ‘Well you have been sleeping all morning, and I already brought two cot’s I was giving you one and I was going to keep one, but then when I came up and saw the room wasn’t done I thought why not? I started painting and before I knew it I’d popped to the baby shop and got more of what I needed, we still need some storage units for their clothes and some sheets, we definitely need to get car seats sorted and a pushchair but I figured we could do that together if you wanted?’ Without warning to herself or Eddie, Rachel found her lips crashing against his, the kiss was over in a blink of an eye and Rachel was thoroughly embarrassed. Rachel shook her head and apologised before dashing off to the bathroom to let out the sob that she knew was coming. It was the quickest she’d moved in days, weeks even but Rachel felt a fool and she couldn’t bare to look at Eddie. There was a gentle knock on the door, and then the handle turned…


	9. ‘All that I know is, no matter how far away’

‘Come here Rachel’. Eddie picked Rachel up from the edge of the bath where she was perched and wrapped her in his arms, holding her tightly but mindful of her bump. Drawing circles on her back he gently in his own way calmed her down. ‘Rachel why did you run off?’ ‘I know I made a mistake I was just so emotional; you’d done all of that for our girls and I got carried away, and now I can’t stop crying, damn emotions’. ‘Rachel, I did it for you too not just our girls, I won’t have you doing too much, your carrying precious cargo! And for your information you didn’t get carried away, I wanted nothing more than to kiss you, but I think we need to talk openly and rationally when Michael isn’t downstairs, more than likely eating his weight in chocolate! I meant what I said last night Rachel, I do love you too, never stopped actually, but I do want to take this slowly I want to talk and for us to be honest with each other, but right now what I want more than anything is to go and eat, I’m starving!’  
With that Eddie kissed Rachel on the top of her head ordered her to wash her face, mascara was running down her cheeks, and meet him downstairs in ten then we were taking them out for lunch no excuses. 

Michael wasn’t impressed that his Daddy had been painting without him, however when he was allowed to put the bears, he brought in the cot’s of each of the girls he was suitably pleased. Equally so the prospect of going out for tea was a plus for Michael. ‘We go soft play Daddy?’ ‘Yes mate, were just going to get in the car and wait for Rach okay?’ ‘kay Daddy’ ‘Rach I’m going to put Mikey in the car, don’t be too long okay’ Rachel slipped her denim jacket over her arm and locked up joining Eddie and Michael in the car, ‘all set?’ ‘Yes lets go Daddy!’  
They pulled up to a small pub on the outskirts of Rochdale it was quite rural with a quaint family feel, there was a soft play there for Michael. The trio got out and walked into the entrance Michael in the middle holding both hands of the adults, ‘Swing me pweease’ both adults granted the little boys request and swung him slightly off his feet by his wrists whilst they were walking along. Rachel looked over at Eddie and smiled sweetly, he grinned back utterly in rapture at the scene he was currently in. As they got inside the hostess greeted them, table for three is it? ‘Yes please’ – ‘Follow me I’ll show you to your table, the soft play is open too would you like to sit that side of the restaurant?’ ‘Yes please, Daddy promised if I was good and ate my carrots I could play!’ ‘No worries little man I have just the table, and I’m sure your going to eat all your carrots for your Mummy and Daddy, guess what they taste just like sweeties’ said the waitress with a wink to Michael. ‘I’m going to be a big brother you know, I need to be able to see in the dark for when my sissy cry so I can help Mummy’ Eddie went to correct Michael and Rachel put her hand on his arm shaking her head, ‘Best not to correct him, maybe speak to Alison, I don’t want to upset her or confuse him even more’ ‘Yes quite right, Mikey go on and play we’ll call you when your lunch is here’ ‘kay Daddy, make sure you watch me Mummy Rachey!’ In that moment Rachel was happy whatever was going on with her and Eddie, it wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable. They were talking, communicating, and singing from the same sheet. This next week was going to be fine she thought to herself, they could do this come up with a new normal together. 

‘Well, Well, Well. I see you took my sloppy seconds back again Rachel, I knew you were desperate I didn’t know you were pathetic though…’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I’ve given you a sneaky Saturday update and a little filler chapter (probs the smallest one ive written), I think this story is coming to an natural cross road at this point, I have planned 15 chapters in this. I have started another fic from Eddie’s point of view as you may have noticed this is entirely Rachel’s so let me know if that is something you would enjoy, I also have another concept for later on in the time line involving Eddie, Rachel and Melissa with all the kids, it a bit dark and twisty I want to write the majority of it but let me know if that’s something that you would want or not. I am back to school next week and its bank holiday here so I’m going to enjoy what is left of the weekend before mayhem returns once more and its school runs and classroom drama! Thanks once more to all my guest reviews, and to RachelMasonFan39 for always being the first to read and comment on my chapters and filling me with praise! I really do appreciate it! A xx


	10. 'Til the walls don't need the ceiling

Place we were made – Chapter 10 ‘'Til the walls don't need the ceiling”

‘Well, Well, Well. I see you took my sloppy seconds back again Rachel, I knew you were desperate I didn’t know you were pathetic though…’

‘What do you want Melissa?’ ‘Oh here he is the ever indecisive Edward Lawson love a Fenshaw sister don’t ya Eddie turn you on does it? having both of us?’ ‘I think you should leave Melissa.’ ‘Leave why this is a free country I can come and go as I very well please, thank you very much. I’m here to see my sister’ ‘Sister? She’s only your sister when you see fit Melissa eh or when you want something from her like free childcare, bail out on your latest cock up?’ ‘What would you know? With her for five minutes and then you come running back to me. Then when I don’t want you, you sulk back to her?’  
Rachel just sat there, she was still in shock that Melissa had turned up- it had been nearly six months since she had seen her, and the last time she was pregnant. Where was the baby she thought to herself. Melissa looked a state, bags under her eyes, she’d put on extra weight, her trousers were just a tad too tight. Her hair hadn’t been washed in weeks, and the stench from her was enough to intoxicate half the pub. Rachel couldn’t help but feel sorry for her, no matter what Melissa had done, the choices she had made she was still Rachel’s baby sister. ‘You just going to ignore me then? You always were a stuck up bitch. Always thinking you were above everyone else when you will always be that slut who ran off to London to charge people for sex Amanda.’

‘Come on, I think you’ve said enough don’t you?’ ‘Oh I have only just begun, Amanda can take it cant you? COME ON! Stick up for yourself what’s a matter cat got your tongue?’ Melissa shoved Rachel nearly knocking her off the chair she was sitting on. Eddie stood up and put himself in between Melissa and Rachel. ‘Melissa I will not tell you again its time for you to go.’ ‘Not until she tells me to.’ Rachel moved her chair backwards and started to stand. ‘Rachel, sit down you do not need to go anywhere.’ ‘No Eddie, I do because I have heard enough. If I repulse you that much little sister then you will not care if I walk out of that door. You clearly think so little of me, that my existence will be irrelevant to you, and if that is the case, I would like you to leave my house, my furniture, and my car. I would like you to leave my life and stay out, you seem very adamant that I am a burden to you so unburden yourself and leave my life. You see Eddie, that nice house in the suburbs I brought it. When you and I split I let Melissa live there for Phil and her baby. The nice Audi she drives, I “leant” her the money knowing full well she wouldn’t give me a penny back. Melissa everything you ever got in life, the clothes on your back the jewelry around your neck all came from mugs like me. You have never provided anything for yourself let alone your children. You think the world owes you a favour, for what eh? What hardship has ever happened to you? Daddies favourite child, you say jump and everyone around you says how high? Standing up now, Melissa was able to see Rachel – see her bump and she was gobsmacked. ‘You see Melissa this is not about you; life is more than just you and your needs and regardless of your petty jibes and cruel taunts we do not need you. At that moment Michael chose the right moment to come bounding in and ran into Rachel’s arms. ‘This is my family, Michael, Eddie, my girls and Philip who will always be welcome in my home. And before you even think about saying anything, my interaction with Eddie is none of your business, he is the father of my children and for that he will always be loved. You have been pampered for too long Melissa its time to take ownership of your own mistakes and grow up. With that Rachel took Michael back to the soft play not once looking back. Once out of view Rachel’s breath felt tight she held in a sob. Michael immediately wrapped his arms tightly round her neck and snuggled into her, ‘I love you Rachey’. 

Eddie wasn’t long after Rachel, suggesting that they go back to Rachel’s and order take away, Rachel nodded in agreement, knowing she wasn’t hungry but wanted to get home. ‘Quite right, lets go home’.  
In the end they stopped at the Pizza place and picked up a pizza. Rachel had never been so happy to sink into her spot on the sofa letting out a content sigh, to finally be sitting comfortably, the twins had been moving all day, and truth be told Rachel was suffering with back pain intermittently not that she would tell Eddie. ‘Ooh I’ll love you forever if you promise not to stop.’ Rachel exclaimed when Eddie picked up her feet and sat under them holding them in his hands rubbing all around, taking special care with her swollen ankles, ‘You’ll love me forever eh, and this is all I have to do… ill have to think about it’ ‘Eddie! I will love you forever regardless of if you rub my elephant feet, I meant what I said. You are the father of all my kids and for that I will always love you.’  
Eddie didn’t think he leant over and cupped Rachel’s face in his hands and whispered ‘I bloody love you Rachel Mason’ before kissing her, pouring everything that was said and unsaid into that kiss, Rachel felt alive, her skin was tingling, every hair on her body was standing on edge. Rachel delighted in how she felt when Eddie kissed her, it was like they were the only two people in the world, and nothing but them and their love of each other in that moment mattered. ‘Eddie, what did Melissa mean when she said you came back to me because she didn’t want you?’ ‘Rachel.’ ‘No Eddie I trust you completely I just, well I thought I didn’t want to know what happened when you left but, I think I do… ouch.’ ‘Rach, is everything okay?’ ‘Yeah the twins are just, owh.’ 

A gush of water landed on the floor, and Rachel’s mustard yellow dress was soaked along with the crushed velvet grey sofa. ‘Erm, Eddie. I think my waters just broke.’


	11. “You smoke to choke the feeling”

Place we were made – Chapter 11 “You smoke to choke the feeling”

‘Eddie, I think the babies are coming’…

‘Eddie, its too early. I still have 9 weeks left. This cannot be happening, they’re not ready. I’m not ready. Arrrhgghhh’ Rachel doubled over on the sofa panting in pain. Rachel bolted off the sofa, as quickly as she could manage searching for something. ‘Eddie aaahhh’. Eddie was calm under pressure; he called Alison and explained what was happening and that they would be dropping Michael home on the way to the hospital. In the meantime, he had gone up the stairs and got Rachel some PJ’s and some clean clothes from her room, before texting Phillip to tell him what was going on. Rachel was now pacing the living room, hands on the small of her back, cursing herself for not going to any of the antenatal classes her midwife had suggested. Rachel wondered where Eddie had got too, she knew he was probably explaining to Mikey what was going on, but she could help but want him near her. Michael popped his head room; ‘Bye Rachey! Daddy says that Mummy wants me home now, I’m going into the car. I see you soon though yeah?’ With that Michael ran over to Rachel and hugged her tight, Rachel held in a whimper of pain by kissing the little boy on his head. ‘I love you Mikey.’ ‘Love you too Mummy Rach, bye ‘Onnie and Ted.’ Michael kissed Rachels bump and swiftly left. Eddie shouted from the hall for Michael to get into his car and he would be there in a minute. ‘Eddie you cant leave me, please don’t leave me. I don’t know what to do, do I call an ambulance? Eddie I want you to come to the hospital please.’ Eddie chuckled to himself, how could she even believe for one moment that he wouldn’t want to be at the hospital. ‘Rach breathe. Alison is meeting me down the road at the retail park, I will be done 10 minutes max, I have rang the hospital they are expecting us, we will go as soon as I get back, its not wise for Mikey to see you in this pain.’ ‘Can’t Alison come here? Please don’t leave me alone.’ Rachel had only ever begged once before in her life and that was for Eddie to stay at Waterloo Road when he had found out about Hordley and her past, she would have gotten on her knees if she was sure she would have been able to get up again. ‘Okay let me call Alison’. 

They arrived at Rochdale General hospital in a record ten minutes, if Rachel was sure about her surroundings she would have sworn that Eddie must have broken the speed limit, and gone through at least 2 red lights, however Eddie had luck on his side and didn’t have to stop at any lights along the way. Parking was an issue, Rachel was ready to get out and walk for some pain relief when Eddie noticed a space, it was at the furthest point of the car park much to Rachel’s annoyance. ‘Eddie I don’t think I can walk that far…’ Eddie picked her up without hesitation, even pregnant with twins Rachel was still light enough to comfortably carry into the hospital entrance. 

‘Rachel Mason 36 – 33 + 3 weeks multiples, waters broke at home roughly 45 minutes ago’ ‘Hi Rachel my name is Dr Farrar I am the Dr on charge this evening, Michelle and Dr Wallace will be on in the morning, so myself and Angela will be assisting with you tonight if that’s okay?’ ‘uh huh’ ‘Rachel we know this is a worrying time, but we will do our best for you and your babies okay. Is this Dad?’ ‘Eddie Lawson’. Once they arrived on the ward, and into the room that would be Rachel’s for the foreseeable, Eddie helped Rachel into a hospital gown, one of the ones where they tie at the back and you can see everything. Angela the midwife brought some surgical sock for Rachel just in case the worst happened and a natural birth could happen. ‘So I’m going to have a peek and see whats happening down there and see if we can find out what these pesky twins are up to eh flower, little uncomfortable that’s all’. Rachel and Eddie both looked at each other and rolled their eyes, one thing Rachel detested was unrequited terms of endearment, Angela was doing little to stem the worry and anguish that they both were experiencing. ‘Whats happening?’ ‘Its normal to be worried with your first pregnancy flower, looking at your cervix your only 1cm dilated, so there are some techniques we can try to keep them cooking a little longer, I’m just going to put this monitor on your belly, this will monitor the heart beats of those little angels and ensure they don’t get to worried like Mum here. I’ll just grab Dr Farrar now and we’ll soon have you sorted flower, don’t go far now.’ With that Angela left the room. ‘God almighty, Eddie I cannot put up with that woman for the duration of this labour, cant we request someone different? She keeps calling me flower! Flower? I mean come on!’ Eddie grabbed Rachel’s hand, ‘Your just worried about the twins and in pain, channel her out come on if you can put up with Steph Haydock for 2 years, then you can do this.’ Rachel chuckled before bracing with another contraction, the monitor that Angela had put on her made it easier for Eddie to spot them too. It seemed like forever before the Dr came back into the room, she looked at the print outs of the twins heart beats and Rachel’s notes before telling them both she needed a second opinion, the colour drained from both their faces, a second opinion was never a good sign. Eddie moved to sit on the bed beside Rachel, who was sobbing uncontrollably, Dr Farrar had put her on a drip to stop labour which had reduced the pain but twin 2 Connie was in foetal distress, if it didn’t get any better soon she would have to be delivered, Dr Wallace had arrived and Rachel felt slightly better, she explained that delivering Connie would be her best chance at survival and would give Teddy a chance too.

So they found themselves in the Operating Room, Eddie looked funny in surgical scrubs and a hair net, he cradled her head, whispering reassuring words into her ear but Rachel couldn’t stop crying, the thoughts going through her head on repeat, why didn’t I tell him sooner, why didn’t I rest, why didn’t I listen, its all my fault, I didn’t eat the right things, I worked too much, they’re going to die and it will be all my fault. As if by magic Eddie could hear the thoughts going on in her head, ‘Rach this isn’t your fault. The girls will be fine, 33 weeks is old enough, she will be just like her Mom a fighter and we will fight for her and her sister too. You, me them and Mikey were a family remember, we will be okay Rach. Eddie kissed her forehead and continued to stroke her hair. The Dr’s were all talking in hushed tones, it was excruciating not knowing what they were saying what was happening, Rachel was in a trance she knew where she was but all she could feel was scared, and the tugging in her abdomen.   
There was no cry. Eddie watched as Michelle took Connie over to an incubator, she was tiny, floppy in the midwifes arms. Tears streamed down Eddies face. ‘Is she okay? Why isn’t she crying? I want to see her, let me see her. Someone tell me what’s going on!’ Rachel was panicking trying to get up off the table. Angela and Dr Farrar had to hold her down. ‘Calm down Rachel. Michelle is with your daughter doing her best, we need you to stay calm for your other daughter, she needs you, they both need you.’

Eddie was rooted to the spot, he couldn’t talk, or look at Rachel all that was going on in his mind was that he couldn’t lose her, not again. Not another child.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the delay in this chapter, I had one ready to go but I decided I didn’t like it much. I’ve had my first week back a school this week and it has been so surreal for my colleagues and the kids, were all adjusting to the new normal and our social bubbles. Covid has a lot to answer for! Anyway slightly different but I just went with it, I’m sorry its depressing but it will get better I promise. Hoping to update midweek, fingers crossed! Once again thank you to my followers and readers, your comments mean a lot. A xox


	12. "I know every streetlight"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so so sorry I has taken me so long to update, Covid-19 has been in our house and with my husband, me and the kids all being sick at one point and juggling work its been so hard. But I promise this story will be completed soon! 
> 
> Thanks again for you continued reading, (If you are still reading!) I'd love to know your thoughts.
> 
> A xx

Place we were made – Chapter 12 ‘I know every streetlight…’

‘Charge to 180…. Stand Clear…. Shocking…’

Dr’s and nurses were working tirelessly to stem the bleeding coming from Rachel’s uterus. If her heart wouldn’t start beating on its own soon, they would have to take the second baby out, Eddie had been removed from the theatre and was now pacing the corridor outside. He heard the piercing cry of baby Theodora. This was not a good sign.  
Mr Lawson? Eddie?’ Eddie was routed to the spot. ‘How’s Rachel? The girls?’ The midwife explained that Connie was in neonatal care now, she needs some extra help with her breathing, that even though technically she was full term being a twin meant that she was a little underdeveloped. However, now, Dr Farrar brought out a bundle wrapped in a pink blanket, ‘Hello Dad, I believe this little girl wants to meet her Daddy?’. Eddie looked down at the little girl placed into his waiting arms, her brown hair and big eyes staring back at him. She was perfect. And already resembling Rachel in temperament and looks if that could even be possible minutes after being born. ‘We recommend skin on skin contact to form an attachment, Rachel will be out of theatre soon and in recovery, if I can take you to her room then you and Baby girl can get to know each other?’ ‘Theodora, Teddy. Is Rachel okay? I heard.’ ‘Why don’t we go and sit down, and I will tell you everything?’ 

They moved to the side room where Rachel would be brought and Eddie un-buttoned his shirt, thankful more than ever that he never wore a tie, unless trying to impress Rachel. Placing his sweet little daughter down on his chest with the blanket draped over her back. Gurgling noises and little cries could be heard, Eddie calming soothed the babe in his arms, whispering sweet nothings into her ear. ‘Mummy is going to be just fine, Teddy she’s a warrior, she’s so strong, just wait until you meet her you will love her just as much maybe even more than I do. And I love her a lot, I’ve not told her in a while, not properly. You know she named you after your Granny Thea she’s going to love you and your sister, I’ve not even had the chance to tell her yet! You see I was stupid. I was scared, I had never needed anyone like I needed your Mummy and it made me crazy, I should have waited, been patient but I couldn’t I wanted her so badly I went for the next best thing, which actually wasn’t. Eddie rolled his eyes as he thought about the time spent with Melissa and cursed himself for thinking with his appendage instead of his head. It was true the ramblings coming out of his mouth to his minute old daughter, he was impatient and scared, to be lonely but more of his feelings. Mummy didn’t tell me about you because she thought I had another little boy, we must introduce you to Mikey hes so excited to meet you and Connie, hes going to be the best big brother! But Mummy thinks that you have another brother I didn’t get the chance to tell her that, John isn’t mine.   
Dr Farrar walked into the room, clearing his throat alerting Eddie to his presence. Mr Lawson, ‘Eddie please, how is Rachel and the baby?’ ‘The baby is smaller than we would have liked, we believe that Rachel and the twins suffered from something called Twin-to-Twin transfusion syndrome, it means that Teddy got more than her fair share leaving Connie struggling, her lungs are not developed fully and she will need help from a ventilator for the next 9 weeks, we will be keeping her in and monitoring her until what would have been their due date, should she make improvements before that time then we will reassess accordingly but for now your daughter will be staying in the NICU. Rachel lost a lot of blood and suffered from a haemorrhage and as a result her heart stopped beating, and we needed to resuscitate. 

The room started to spin, Eddie couldn’t believe what he was hearing, what had happened, not this morning, he was looking forward to knowing Rachel again, to being a family with their girls and Michael, now here he was his mouth dry and knees weak, tears were on the verge of spilling out of his eyes, the baby on his chest started to cry, and wriggle. At that moment Michelle the midwife came to take Teddy. ‘I think someone needs feeding and a good clean, I’ll come and get you once were cleaned up’. ‘Can I see her? Rachel?’ ‘Of course, she is due out of theatre any minute you can wait here for her or I can take you to the NICU to meet your other daughter?’ ‘You mean Rachel’s alive?’ Eddie was shell shocked, he had immediately thought the worst had happened that he would face a life without her, before getting to tell her the truth that he didn’t need time, space or anything like that. That he didn’t want to be parted from her a minute longer.   
Eddie declined the offer to go down to the NICU, he wasn’t sure he was able to see his daughter hooked up to machines and in an incubator, not without seeing Rachel first. She, they were all his priority now, he sat on the window sill of the hospital room for what seemed an eternity, the sound of the clock testing his patience, shuffling constantly to look out into the corridor and then out of the window, he huffed. Eddie had never been good at being patient, his recent life decisions a constant reminder of that, however even to the most patient of men, this was a true test of character. Eddie constantly played over the alternates in his mind, what if he lost her? What if he was left a single father in charge of two motherless girls. He got himself so worked up that he didn’t even hear Michelle coming in with two very special deliveries. 

‘Here’s your Daddy, lets show him what we’ve got eh, little one?’ Eddie looked over slyly swiping his tear stained cheeks before plastering on a fake smile. ‘Hello sweetheart, my don’t you look just like your Mommy, look at all that hair!’ Eddie peered into the plastic cot, and made a mental note that he would need to get some car seats sorted pronto, at that moment Michelle handed Eddie a card, in it was a polaroid photo of baby Connie and imprints of her hands and feet. That caused the floodgates to open and Eddie broke down sobbing, ‘She’s so small, and those tubes. Is she in pain?’ ‘We’ve sedated her, the tubes are needed Eddie, they are keeping her strong and helping her to survive, she’s tough this one just like her Mommy eh?’ At that moment two porters wheeled in the gurney which Rachel was lying on. Eddie had never felt such relief. Rachel looked like a princess, asleep waiting for her Prince to wake her. A Dr, who Eddie had never seen before walked in behind Rachel. ‘Hello, you must be the husband, my name is Dr Walker I am a Gynaecologist and worked on your wife, now she’s going to need some sleep she’s been through an ordeal, birth isn’t an easy feat never mind two of them and having you womb ripped apart by my surgeons. I did have to perform some unanticipated procedures, but we’ll go through them once Mrs Lawson is awake. Dr Walker was a tall dangly man with a long face, he wore halfmoon glasses on the end of his nose, and still wore his dark blue surgical scrubs with his yellow and blue scrub cap that looked very similar to those little creatures Mikey was always talking about the ones fascinated with banana’s. The Dr didn’t take a breath it seemed rushing ever so slightly not allowing Eddie a word in edgeways.

‘Ms Mason, I’m not, were not. I’m the father not the husband yet I hope anyway’ Eddie said with a slight glimmer of hope and wonder in his eyes.


	13. Place we were made

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I can only apologise for this. I have lost all my motivation for this story. I have re-written and rewritten this over and over and I am just not happy with it but felt that those of you that follow and perhaps enjoy this story deserved something no matter how terrible. I hope one day to finish this and hopefully re-write this chapter the way I want it to be. But for now I need to take a break and perhaps re-watch the Reddie years on Waterloo Road.   
> Again I am so sorry if I have let anyone down and anyone even still reads this! :(
> 
> A xoxo

Place we were made – Chapter 13 ‘Freezing cold and we don't even know’

Eddie did not know what had come over him, he walked out of the hospital without a second thought. Philip had arrived shortly after the Dr left, they knew that Rachel wouldn’t wake up from the anesthetic for a while yet, and if they had any hope of taking Teddy home they would need the essentials they had not yet brought. He had warned Philip not to tell anyone that the girls had arrived, that was Rachel’s news to tell and Eddie was adamant that she would be able to tell whoever she wanted. He of course told Alison, but asked her not to tell Michael, at least until Rachel was awake and they knew for certain what was happening with the girls, no use getting the little boy worked up for no reason. 

He did need Alison’s help though, he had limited knowledge of what to get for new-born babies, essentials for Rachel were something that perplexed even his mind. Alison met Eddie at the Resorts Complex, he had no idea where to begin, he knew that car seats and a push chair was top priority but so were clothes, nappies and personal items for Rach, he knew that Alison would know exactly what she needed. Alison proved to be a lifeline Eddie didn’t know he needed, as she walked over to him he just crumbled in front of her, all the emotions of the last 5 hours had accumulated and Eddie didn’t know what to do. Stepping into the embrace Alison soothed Eddie’s sobs and was the shoulder he did not know he needed. 

Three cups of coffee and a shared slice of cake later, Eddie and Alison made their way to the shops they needed, Alison had already got the personal products Rachel would need, such as maternity pads, and breast pads before meeting Eddie. Eddie looked at the time, it was gone 7pm, Phillip had not called or text so Rachel must be okay. Shopped out and essentials in the bag Eddie made his way back to Rachel’s to pick her up clothes and then make his way back to the hospital. As he pushed open the front door, he was greeted with the biggest bunch of flowers, roses and peonies, lilies and two sunflowers the message read: ‘To Mummy Rachel and my sisters welcome to the world! Lots of love Mikey xx’ Well all thoughts of not letting Michael know had gone out of the window, Alison had been round, Philip must have let her in the place was spotless. Eddie pulled out his phone and shot a quick text to Alison to thank her. Her reply was instant, letting him know that the fridge was stocked and the bag at the end of the stairs had everything that Rachel would need, and she hoped that Rachel wouldn’t mind her going through her stuff. Eddie silently thanked God their relationship had finally got back on track, whilst their relationship did not work, they were friends first and foremost. Meeting at university, their relationship started out as friends, and Eddie was only too grateful that at this moment he had his friend back. 

Chucking everything into the car, Eddie set out for the hospital. Texting Phillip on the way in to check in. Rachel was still asleep not waking once in the time that Eddie had been gone, Dr Farrar had been in and out and checked Rachel’s vitals, said that the loss of blood was great and she would need time to recover, the only way the body could recover such loss was to be asleep. What Eddie did not expect to see when he walked into the ward Rachel was in was Philip asleep in the corner of the room with Rachel sat upright holding Teddy in her arms. Rachel was glistening in the soft hue of the lights from outside, Eddie could help but stare at two of his favourite people in the world, slowly he crept into the room so not to startle either of them.   
‘I see the moon and the moon sees me, and the moon see the people I want to see, so God bless the moon and God bless me…’ ‘Eddie! I didn’t hear you coming in!’ Exclaimed Rachel, ‘I didn’t want to scare you! How long have you been awake?’ Rachel said she’d be up no more than an hour or so, that the midwife brought Teddy into her just ten minutes ago, the Dr would be coming round soon but she wanted to wait for Eddie before speaking to him. 

‘How’s Connie? Have you seen her? Eddie hadn’t had the heart to tell her that he was too scared to visit their daughter without her, looking into his other daughters eyes, which we big and bright just like her mothers, hazel in colour and so innocent, Eddie hadn’t believed in love at first sight before he met Rachel, now he had fallen again, his girls were going to cause him trouble,

Mr and Mrs Lawson?


	14. Place we were made- reloaded

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, I’m back after some time away. I have re-read my own work and read some new stories and I am inspired to finish this story! I have completely re-written this chapter as I was appalled with what I had rushed to write before. Over the break I have been re-watching WR and I can honestly say that I lost sight of the Characters so needed to completely re-write this. I have some what potentially, maybe some unpopular opinions, mainly about the character Kim. I really do not like her, I feel like she was fake and detrimental to Rachel and got too much airtime. I find the character Max toxic too hence why I have not bought Max into my story. Anyway, waffling on as per usual. I really hope that you (if people still read this) enjoy this re-written part of the story. Hopefully, I can get back into the habit of writing on the weekends. Life is tough for all now but let us take solace in this fantasy and drama!

Place we were made – Chapter 13 re-wind:

What had he said, or why had he said it? Even as the words came out of his mouth, he cringed internally they only just started talking and he was already passing her off as his wife, not that he had not dreamt of calling Rachel Mason his wife from ten minutes after meeting her. The attraction was instant like nothing else either of them had felt before. That sense of impending doom did not sit right with Eddie, he had been here before after the explosion in the canteen, the not knowing. That evening he was not even allowed in the ward, not a family member or significant other. They had not even put a label on what they were now, back together? Co-parenting? Friends? He loved her that much he knew, but did she love him in the way he needed to love her? They did not get the opportunity to work that out. Eddie hadn’t noticed where he was, his feet just walking without even thinking. Philip had arrived shortly after the Dr arrived, the next few hours critical for Rachel and the girls, yet Eddie’s first reaction was to leave. A million thoughts whirled around his head, what was he doing where was he going. Inadequate, irresponsible, stupidity? What was he? The vibrating in his pocket snapped out of his hysteria, it was Alison. 

‘Eddie, I’ve got my mom to have Michael, I have packed some baby grows and stuff for Rachel you know ladies’ things, am I okay to drop them in or you want to come and get them?’ 

‘Er Alison? I erm I can come…’

‘Eddie what’s going on? Is everything okay? How is Rachel? The girls?’

‘Its happening again Ali, I’m letting them down, I’m not good enough for them….’

‘Ed, Eddie don’t you dare do that, you are letting no one down, tell me where you are and I will come to you, we will walk and talk this through…’  
The line went dead. 

Eddie sat still on the bench outside the shopping centre, head in his hands, mind numb from angst and worry. He knew where he should be, but he could not quite bring himself to go there yet, not in this state anyway, turning to an old friend he sent the location to Alison.  
Alison proved to be a lifeline Eddie did not know he needed, as she walked over to him, he just crumbled in front of her, all the emotions of the last 5 hours had accumulated, and Eddie didn’t know what to do. Stepping into the embrace Alison soothed Eddie’s sobs and just held him, affection in so many ways, how far their relationship had come over the years. From friendship, to lovers, to strangers and finally full circle to friends once more. In fact, if Eddie were truly honest with himself, Alison Goodwin was the only friend he could possibly turn to in this moment.  
Three cups of coffee and a shared slice of cake later, Eddie and Alison made their way to the shops they needed, Alison had already got the personal products Rachel would need, such as maternity pads, and breast pads before meeting Eddie. Eddie looked at the time, it was gone 7pm, Phillip had not called or text so Rachel must be okay. Shopped out and essentials in the bag Eddie made his way back to Rachel’s to pick her up clothes and then make his way back to the hospital. As he pushed open the front door, he was greeted with the biggest bunch of flowers, roses and peonies, lilies and two sunflowers the message read: 

‘To Mummy Rachel and my sisters welcome to the world! Lots of love Mikey xx’ 

Well all thoughts of not letting Michael know had gone out of the window, Alison had been hard at work. the place was spotless not that it was ever a mess! Rachel’s OCD wouldn’t allow a pillow out of place. Eddie pulled out his phone and shot a quick text to Alison to thank her. Her reply was instant, letting him know that the fridge was stocked and the bag at the end of the stairs had everything that Rachel would need, and she hoped that Rachel would not mind her going through her stuff. Eddie silently thanked God their relationship was what it was, the greatest outcome of a shitty situation.  
Chucking everything into the car, Eddie set out for the hospital. Texting Phillip on the way in to check in. Rachel was still asleep not waking once in the time that Eddie had been gone, Dr Farrar had been in and out and checked Rachel’s vitals, said that the loss of blood was great, and she would need time to recover, the only way the body could recover such loss was to be asleep. What Eddie did not expect to see when he walked into the ward Rachel was in was Philip asleep in the corner of the room with Rachel sat upright holding Teddy in her arms. 

Rachel was glowing in the soft hue of the lights from outside, she looked radiant, the way she held baby Teddy, the look of longing and pure love in her eyes, was clear a mile away. From the day he met her, Eddie knew that Rachel would be the most perfect mother, the instincts to protect any child, but holding her own in her arms Rachel was a beacon of love and adoration. Eddie could help but stare at two of his favourite people in the world, slowly he crept into the room so not to startle either of them. What did he do to deserve this scenario?   
‘I see the moon and the moon sees me, and the moon see the people I want to see, so God bless the moon and God bless me…’ ‘Eddie! Rachel cried, ‘I didn’t hear you come in!’ ‘I didn’t want to scare you! How long have you been awake?’ Eddie walked over and sat up on the bed next to his two girls, Rachel instantly lent into him, Eddie’s arm coming around her he placed a kiss to the side of her head. Rachel said she had been awake no more than an hour or so, that the midwife brought Teddy into her for a feed, the Dr would be coming round soon but she wanted to wait for Eddie before speaking to them both.

‘How’s Connie? Have you seen her? Rachel asked as she cuddled into Eddie’s side, still enamoured with their daughter, Eddie hadn’t had the heart to tell her that he was too scared to visit their daughter without her, looking into Teddy’s eyes, which we big and bright just like her mothers, hazel in colour and so innocent, Eddie hadn’t believed in love at first sight before he met Rachel, now he had fallen again, his girls were going to cause him trouble,  
Mr and Mrs Mason, I have some good news and some bad news. Firstly about your daughter. Rachel took a deep sharp breath, Philip who had been awake but pretending otherwise had the good grace to wake up at this moment, and ask if he could hold his new cousin, taking Teddy carefully from Rachel, he put her in the Perspex crib and wheeled her out into the corridor off the private room, mentioning he would be back soon. 

Eddie clutched on to Rachel, until his knuckles were white, this was it, this was when the Dr was going to tell him that he wasn’t good enough that he had failed yet another child, the room started to spin and Eddie felt Rachel squeeze his hand reassuring him they were in this together.   
‘Connie is a little small for my liking, we have assessed her vitals, and they have shown her lungs are under-matured, she will need oxygen and feeding via a tube, we will monitor her regularly but for now she needs to stay in the NICU’

‘Under Mature what does that mean?’ Rachel said. ‘Twin to Twin infusion is common, all it means it that Connie will need more support outside of the womb, then Teddy. It sounds scary but we’re just helping her along, she really is tough and is already showing that she’s strong little madame pulled her tube out once already! When you two are ready we can get Ange to take you down to see her’  
Rachel started to cry uncontrollably, Eddie just held on to her tight, thankful for the good news, and secretly thanking any God that would listen to him that his girls were okay.   
‘Now Rachel for the hard news, you sustained a lot of bleeding when we delivered the girls, as you know we had to resuscitate you, and you have received a blood transfusion as you lost a significant volume. In order to save you we had to perform an emergency hysterectomy. You will need follow up care, and hormone replacements but you will be fine, sore for a few days but medically fine. We have councillors in place for you, and we want you to know that we wouldn’t have done the procedure unless absolutely necessary. If you have any questions just give me a call, I’ll leave you two to process the information and send Angie in to take you to your daughter.  
Rachel, wiped away the tears from her cheeks, and let out a sigh of relief, she didn’t know exactly how or what she felt about the news the Dr just told her, but one thing was for certain, she had two daughters, which was two more children then she ever thought she would have so she knew that she was very lucky and should count her blessings.   
‘Rach? You okay? Talk to me?’ Eddie held onto Rachel as tightly as he could without hurting her. ‘Eddie lets go and see our girl’ Smiling as she lent into Eddie placing a chaste kiss onto his lips, reassuring him that whilst she was not okay, they would be okay’ Eddie helped Rachel off the bed and into the awaiting wheelchair the midwife had brought in, Eddie squeezed her shoulder and off they went to see Connie.

The walk down the corridor was a short one, luckily they had placed Rachel in a room near to the NICU. They stopped outside the window, which spanned the length of the wall, there were 5 incubator cribs placed around the room, each hooked up to machines, providing oxygen and fluids for the poorly babies. Rachel scanned the room, there were two boys and three girls in the unit, only identifiable by the different coloured teddy bears on top of the incubators. Eddie lent down to speak to her, whispering into her ear, which one do you think is Connie? Rachel pointed to the crib in the middle of the room, that’s her I can feel it. Once they were both suitably dressed with aprons and facemasks on they were about to enter the unit, Rachel moved from her wheelchair to the armchair next to the crib. ‘Do you want to hold her my love?’ the annoying one was back, but Rachel didn’t care, all she wanted longed for was the chance to hold her baby ‘oh yes please.’ Exclaimed Rachel. Ange explained that Connie would only be allowed out of her incubator for a maximum 30 minutes as she needed the light, that the tubes would still be there so they needed to be extra careful with her. Gently picking her up Ange placed Connie onto Rachel’s bare chest, skin on skin being the best way for Connie to remain calm. Rachel welcomed Connie onto her the little one snuggling into her, the ventilator tube rubbed on Rachel’s scar, this was the first time she felt comfortable enough to not cover it up, that was thanks to Eddie, and the unconditional love she felt for the babe in her arms. Eddie sat close to Rachel and their daughter, placing a kiss to the side of her head, ‘I am so happy Rach I love you.’ Ange asked if they had a camera, and once Eddie passed her his phone she took some photos of the family, Philip had brought Teddy in so they were able to have one altogether, the scene was Rachel still cradling Connie on her chest, looking down on her auburn hair, Eddie sitting on the arm of the chair with Teddy in his arm, her hair just ever so slightly lighter than her sisters. Both parents looked as if they had been walking on cloud nine, the picture of devotion and happiness.   
Glancing at the name tag on Teddys ancle and the name card on Connie’s crib Rachel said: ‘We’ll have to ask them to change that Eddie’, ‘Yes it should say Connie and Teddy Mason I agree’ ‘No Eddie that’s not their names’ Eddie snapped straight up to meet Rachels stare. ‘I want all the people I love most in this world to share the same name, our daughters are called Theodora May Lawson and Constance Emma Lawson’. 

Eddie couldn’t believe that not 3 months ago he didn’t even know he had two daughters and now her he was holding his little girls, who shared his name with the love of his life, no matter how they had come to being in this world, he wouldn’t change a thing about them or their mother. Who did he have to thank for this situation, never in his wildest dreams did he imagine this scene playing out, when Melissa turned up on that grey May morning, he thought he had lost Rachel for good. No amount of I love you’s could save their relationship, Melissa had put pay to that. Her intent on ruining her sisters life apparent from the moment she strolled into the office with the lie on her lips, the smirks and grins throughout the day, even when she could see the anguish and pain across Eddie and Rachel’s faces that day she still went ahead with the most unforgiving lie. Four months later when John was born, Eddie was chuffed another son, bitter sweet but he wouldn’t let him down, As the days went on Eddie found Melissa dumping John on him more and more, it wasn’t until he was sick that Eddie found out the truth, John needed a blood transfusion and Melissa nor Eddie were matches. Melissa cried and claimed she didn’t know any better but who was Eddie kidding this was all he needed to walk away from her for good. Yes it was hard at first, he had bonded with John but Eddie resented him from the moment he was born deep down he knew that however heartless it was this baby was the reason he wasn’t with Rachel.   
When he had received the call from Chlo Grainger, Eddie saw red, how could she have kept that from him, did she hate him that much? But now look at where he was, so much love in this room. He had the girl times three there was no way he was letting her go again. 

‘Rach, I want all my girls to have the same name too, I know its soon but Its not is it, I mean since the first time I saw you back in the Waterloo Road office, I knew, I knew you were special. I was an ass but if my being an ass meant I was in the same room as you then it was worth it. I made mistakes and so did you but one thing that has remained true is my love for you. I love… I love you and there is no stopping me. You drive me crazy, but I do not want to spend another minute parted from you and our girls. You Rachel Mason have made me the happiest man in the world today, our daughters and Mikey love you. You are formidable and I am in awe of you. Please do me the honour of taking my last name?’ Rachel let out the longest breath, all of sudden an alarm sounded on the machine Connie was on, Ange took her from Rachel and placed her back in the incubator, instantly the machines silenced. Ange left quietly leaving Rachel and Eddie in a trance staring at each other. 

‘Are you asking what I think you are?’ 

‘Rachel Mason, will you marry me?’


End file.
